topic Re: reply in Coping with a loved one's cancer

My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Sat, 24 Mar 2018 14:29:56 GMT

Hi, my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma in August 2017. He was having symptoms earlier the year and 2016 but GP just brush us off with normal pain killers. Only when my husband demanded a full body scan in July 2017 then we knew something was wrong. Went to hospital, seen the hemotologist and started Low grade chemo Rchop full 6 rounds. Failed. Then medium grade Ferrari protocol 3 rounds with lumbar puncture as it gone to the brain and spine. Failed and gone to RICE 1 round and that failed too. My husband is totally devastated. Only 2 more types of chemo to try and they are 50/50 chance. Doctor says let him do what he wants, enjoy any food he likes. Feels like it’s telling me it is the end let him do it with no regrets. I cried. I feel so helpless. I don’t want to lose my Husband. I do not know what I can do to help.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

little_stitcher — Sun, 25 Mar 2018 02:52:20 GMT

Hi Jennifer, I'm so sorry to hear you and your husband have to go through this. I'm glad you found this forum- it's a great place to vent/ask/be encouraged and surrounded by people who are in similar situations, and it's available 24/7. We're all here cheering you and your husband on. Big hugs! Emily

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Sun, 25 Mar 2018 09:20:36 GMT

Thank you little stitcher. It is so hard. Back in hospital becos his lymph notes swell up and blocked his airway. He is in pain. Helpless.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Elaines — Wed, 28 Mar 2018 05:31:55 GMT

Hi jennifer

I feel for you. And know what you re going through. My husband too was diagnosed recently with a rare aggressive cancer. I was so devastated i couldmt eat or sleep. Worse thing is i have a young 6 yr old daughter. And i worry for all of us. Its a terrible thing to go through. How are you coping? May i ask if you re based in perth?

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Wed, 28 Mar 2018 12:29:28 GMT

Hi Elaines, sorry to hear about yours. Yes I am based in Perth. Devastated, emotionally drained, stress and worry on the what if’s.

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Elaines — Wed, 28 Mar 2018 13:26:06 GMT

I totally know how u feel. U described every emotion im going through. Please feel free to share with me. Im also reaching out as no one who isnt going through the same experience, will know how exhausting draining and sad it is.. i too, am so worried about the future and everything else. Do you have kids jenny.

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Jenniferwang — Thu, 29 Mar 2018 14:18:40 GMT

Hi elaines, no we do not have kids. I have pcos so plan to go through IVF but things happen before we got the chance. Now all the high level chemo has made my Husband infertile. We will never get the chance to have our own biological kids.

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Elaines — Thu, 29 Mar 2018 15:34:53 GMT

Im so sorry jennifer. My heart goes out to you. You must be a young couple to be headed for ivf. As much as im hurting, i also feel for u. We re both going thru a very trying time and like me, im sure at times you feel a sense of hopelessness and devastation. Even getting through a day is tough for me. Im also worried about the future. For me, with a young child i worry how it ll affect her.

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Elaines — Thu, 29 Mar 2018 15:40:05 GMT

Im so sorry jennifer. My heart goes out to you. You must be a young couple since you were headed to ivf. It must be difficult. We re both going thru a tough time and for me, its so hard to even get thru a day. Im so worried for our future, and how it ll affect my 6 yr old.

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Jenniferwang — Fri, 30 Mar 2018 08:03:49 GMT

Thanks Elaines. i am sorry that you are going through so much as well. It is just a lot to think about and deal with. My husband keeps telling me to stay positive and strong, but i find it so hard but i know i have to.

How i wish i can take his pain away everyday.

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Elaines — Fri, 30 Mar 2018 12:15:04 GMT

You are absolutely right. I think we re very similar in how we think of our situation.. i too, feel his pain especially when hes going thru heavy chemo and radiotherapy. My husband too remains positive and tells me to think likewise, its only human to worry and be distraught.
For the first 2 weeks after diagnosis i felt so bad and was so down, i couldnt even get out of bed and felt terrible everyday..
I felt a heaviness that just sat over my shoulders and wouldnt go away .. there were times i even asked myself, if people actually could survive this...

Re: reply

Jenniferwang — Fri, 30 Mar 2018 13:01:24 GMT

I wonder the same thing too. My friends say we will but I can’t see it at the moment. Now I can do is make him happy, let him do what he wants and eat what he wants. Letting him live happily with no regrets.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Nina6 — Fri, 20 Apr 2018 02:56:52 GMT

I m so sorry you have to go through this terrible..terrible journey jenniferwang ...no words can make it better...keep talking to the medical team ...asking questions...and keep venting on this forum...

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Fri, 20 Apr 2018 12:10:41 GMT

Thanks nina6 . Just been told yesterday by our doctor he has only a few months to live. Deem as terminal now. I am upset at myself. Angry why this happen to my Husband, my Best Friend, the love of my life. I don’t know what to do next.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Nina6 — Sat, 21 Apr 2018 01:09:29 GMT

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Nina6 — Sat, 21 Apr 2018 01:17:02 GMT

Oh...ifeel so sad for you..jenniferwang.. im sitting here today just so sad one of those days i cant stop crying....if you can just talk and talk leave no stone unturned...have no regrets.. just surround each other with love...lots of love to you .

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Akhey — Sat, 21 Apr 2018 07:27:02 GMT

Yoy can't eat any food you want. Doctors are wrong. Grain, sugar and dairy are the cause of most cancers.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Sat, 21 Apr 2018 14:02:59 GMT

Thanks nina. Feeding him with lots of love. But today he has so much anger. He just scold me for everything. I hate to see him like this. I feel is all my fault.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Jenniferwang — Sat, 21 Apr 2018 14:01:13 GMT

Yes. We putting on a strict detoxic to flush out the chemo and giving lots of fruit and vege fresh juice as no he only can consume fruits and nothing else.

Re: My husband was told treatment not working.

Nina6 — Tue, 24 Apr 2018 07:33:09 GMT