topic Re: Here we go again. in Coping with a loved one's cancer

Here we go again.

WTFAgain — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 08:04:21 GMT

I wanted to join this forum to reach out to other wives supporting husbands through cancer diagnosis, treatment and after.

After 10 years of good check up results and scans, my wonderful man got the dreaded news, "There is a mass".

My head just swam, I found it hard to breathe and of course just clung on to my husband.

He'd been here before, 11 years ago, it just didn't make sense. All the questions swimming through my mind.

But just like the 1st time, I swung into action, found out what was planned, when treatment would start, and helped my man.

No 2 people react to their diagnosis the same, but I have supported my husband by caring for his wellbeing, he is too busy fighting to be worried about when appointments are, when to take medicines and all day to day stuff.

BUT, I have always consulted him as to if he is ok with how I am managing things for him. Not assuming that he is incapable or too tired.

Basically I just want to say,

STAY POSITIVE as much as allowed

STAY STRONG, both of you

PLAN

FOCUS on small wins and good news

LAUGH, it does kinda help.

BE THANKFUL,

Re: Here we go again.

Anonymous — Wed, 29 Jul 2020 12:07:37 GMT

Hi @WTFAgain

I am supporting my husband with pancreatic cancer. He had surgery to remove the tumour and is having chemo now.

Re: Here we go again.

Anonymous — Fri, 31 Jul 2020 10:54:21 GMT

How has your week been @WTFAgain ?

Re: Here we go again.

MargieSM — Sat, 08 Aug 2020 08:33:12 GMT

Hey Darcy my husband has recently had the Whipple procedure, been home for a week and I'm so overwhelmed. Any tips, please?

Re: Here we go again.

Anonymous — Sun, 09 Aug 2020 02:59:57 GMT

The Whipple Warrior Caregiver Support Group on Facebook has been helpful @MargieSM .

Diet is the biggest lifestyle change, dietary enzymes may be needed and keeping an eye out for symptoms is useful. It is super major surgery and recovery is slow.

I allowed my husband to focus on his healing and do things as they are able to, monitoring the new eating regimen, managing the drains that were in situ and taking daily temperature gave me something to focus on that I could do.

To help with the overwhelm I bumped up my own counseling and started doing one thing a day to help myself, it might be as simple as washing my hair, pulling a few weeds in the garden, doing a spot of housework etc. Our partners generally don't need 24/7 supervision, so going out occasionally can be helpful.

Re: Here we go again.

MargieSM — Sun, 09 Aug 2020 05:54:10 GMT

Thank you @Anonymous, I’ve joined WWCSG
Hubby is on dietary enzimes as well as anti nausea meds, however feel nauseous for part of the day & chemo hasn’t even began.

Re: Here we go again.

Anonymous — Sun, 09 Aug 2020 06:34:23 GMT

We went back to basics @MargieSM small meals and often, some people find salads /raw veg difficult. We were fortunate that hubby has been able to eat ok (but watching serving sizes). Perhaps a question to pose for the WWCSG ...

How are you going @WTFAgain