Both parents diagnosed

Kathy12 — Sun, 02 Aug 2026 09:45:26 GMT

Hi guys, I just signed up to this group. I am having trouble coping with life lately.. My Mum was diagnosed way back in 2008 with Breast cancer. She had radiation but no chemo. My Father was diagnosed on 8th May this year with Multiple Myeloma, he was in so much pain in his back for about 2 months before it was diagnosed. 4 days after he was diagnosed my Mums oncologist called me and my brother and father into her office to tell us that Mums cancer is now in hips lungs spine ribs and brain and the breast cancer is worse and the treatment she has been having the past 4 years isnt doing anything any longer. She has been have Fulvestrant and she blew the oncologist away for 4 years. So within 4 days we were told both parents are dying of cancer. I brought them to my house. 2 hours away from theirs to care for them. I took dad to the local hospital for pain management and get him started on treatment which they were going to do until he contracted pneumonia. exactly 3 weeks from being diagnosed he passed away. Now my mum is getting worse. Very tired, confused, feeling like crap all the time. not wanting to eat. has refused her tablets, She wants to die and I am wondering if this is a way to make it happen. I am sorry for going on and on but I really need someone to tell me this is ok and quite normal. Thank you for reading. xx

Re: Both parents diagnosed

Miranda_ccnsw — Mon, 03 Aug 2026 04:11:54 GMT

Hi @Kathy12

Thank you for sharing this with us. What you have been through is an incredible amount to carry. To learn that both of your parents had advanced cancer diagnoses within days of each other, then lose your dad so soon while caring for your mum, is heartbreaking.

It's completely understandable that you're struggling. Many people in similar circumstances experience a mix of grief, overwhelm, sadness, fear, and exhaustion. There is no 'right' way to feel.

You may find our resource Understanding Grief helpful as you navigate the loss of your father and everything that's happening with your mum

Another avenue that may be of help is calling our team on 13 11 20 to chat about support options that are available to people affected by cancer. Counselling may be an option and something you find supportive - they can talk about it with you.

Please be gentle with yourself.
Miranda
CCNSW

topic Re: Both parents diagnosed in Coping with a loved one's cancer

Both parents diagnosed

Re: Both parents diagnosed