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TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 00:56:33 GMT

I am new to this site - joined yesterday. I have spent the last couple of hours trying to negotiate my way through this site. I have been reading old topics from last year, and am amazed that there are generally so few responses! At times, there have been posts, that nobody responded too. I just wonder how that makes the person who posted the question/statement feel? Does it make them feel like nobody cares; their problem isnt 'big enough' to warrant a reply or just that it wasnt interesting enough. Do these people leave the site thinking it was a waste of time joining. There seems to be a few regulars who respond, which is great, but surely members can post a response to any topic, even it is just a smiley/sad face or an 'I dont know'. I feel any acknowledgement is better than nothing. Sorry to be picky, but I hope members respond to any comments I make or questions I ask.

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Sailor — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 01:08:34 GMT

G'day diannep52 There are many reasons people join a site like this and it is not always to respond to others. I joined as in another life time I belonged to a similar site and found it very helpful. What characterised that site, this one, and I believe most similar sites, is that there is a core of people who work the site, put up there issues and respond to others. There are people who interact for a while, come and go as their need suggests. therre are others, who lurl on the site, watch what is going on and very occasionally contribute. cheers Sailor

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 01:15:06 GMT

thanks for the quick response Sailor. Maybe I had a different expectation for this site. I just thought so many people, with many varying types of cancer, would be able to answer questions, etc with far more accuracy than most. You seem to be a regular, I've noticed your name popping up throughout many of the discussions, do you know how many active members there are on this site?

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Fri, 14 Jan 2011 05:27:18 GMT

Heya diannep52, People tend to come and go without any response maybe this is not for them who knows,some just join and have no status,i know some topics are out of my league so i don't answer them just in case people take it the wrong way and jump down my throat, i respond to newcomers and welcome them or join in if i think i have some valuable input. most don't seem to be active, I have had some conversations but they tend to stop talking after awhile. other may wish to just read and get comfort from that who knows. Hope you are travelling well and you eventually get what you are looking for. TC Dave

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

harker — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 05:48:43 GMT

I think it is a fair point to raise because I have thought about it myself over the past two years. I tend not to respond to requests for physical health information as I know there is a whole professional network supporting us here and I don't find it all that interesting to talk about drugs, diseases and systems. I am more interested in conversation that is personal and involves reflection and attention to writing. I am very comfortable with the site accommodating each of those needs. i just don't feel I need to be involved in both of them. Also, some people just want to blurt and I guess I think they don't really want an answer. It seems to be more important to them to say what they say. Like me, now, perhaps. H

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

maddie86 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 08:40:41 GMT

i sometimes feel like that.. but not just on here in general 😞 i guess people will respond if they want to.. sometimes maybe ppl dont know the answer? i think as long as someone does reply it will make you feel better 🙂

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

jodielee12 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 08:55:40 GMT

Hi diannep52 the site was my life line while having radiation and it was also where you could say what you think and no one gets upset. we are all on here for some reason or another and sometimes we just cant be on it every day. i would love to be able to chat to all, but time does not permit. i do try to login in once a week just to check on everyone and to see what they are up too, so keep posting your news and you never know, we might be able to chat. cheers Linda

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 09:13:06 GMT

thanks Dave. I guess that is a fair comment 'others may wish to just read and get comfort from that who knows'. I didnt think of that 'side of the coin'. thanks for your input. Di

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 09:16:17 GMT

Thanks everyone for all your input. your comments have put a new perspective on this site for me. Because I am new, I just assumed that this site would be the place for answers, but now I have read all of your comments, I realise that this could just be a 'sounding board' for some people, or a nice quiet online place to just rest and read other people's posts. I have had my eyes opened by all your comments. Thanks again. Di

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Fri, 14 Jan 2011 10:58:25 GMT

Heya Di, well you certainly made an impact and brought us to life..haha..which is a good thing. Most of the US sites seem to be the place to get specific answers to questions but as a fellow head & necker friend of mine says we can only tell you what we have experienced and that may not be the case for other individuals as we all react to things differently and it would be wrong(my opinion only now)for us to say that it will disappear or you will experience this and that. Boy can I chat,hope this explins it a bit better. Dave

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Jules2 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 11:30:45 GMT

There are at times some incedibly interesting conversations on this site. 🙂 Conversations that end up going in all different directions. I do hear what you are saying though and think it is nice if someone gets a response, even if it is just to bump the topic so that others will see it and perhaps respond in a different way.

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 11:41:49 GMT

Thanks again for your replies. @Dave, I guess the best any of us can do with any reply is offer our own experiences and coping mechanisms, without actually saying what is good or bad for the person posting. Maybe next time, I shouldn't come in 'with guns blazing!'. Thanks for your response and yes, it did help. @Jules2, my apologies if I have 'ruffled any feathers'but I was lead to believe that this site was actually bigger than it seems to be. By this I mean more participants. I am sure there are many interesting and varied topics discussed, and I intend to stick around and be a part of these. As I mentioned above to Dave, maybe I should have watched the site for a couple of days, before coming in with 'guns blazing'. Thanks for your reply, it too was very helpful. I hope to catch up with you both more often. Take care. Di

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Jules2 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 11:49:23 GMT

Hey Dianne My feathers aren't ruffled 🙂 ... I think the more people that join in on discussions the better. I think the fact that all of us are trying to deal with either our own diagnosis or that of a family memeber or friend makes it difficult. I know for me i still get very tired even though my treatment finished a year ago. Sometimes I actually put a comment in and the next day realise that I haven't really worded it terribly well ... mostly due to lack of time or tiredness. Great to have someone on board that is interested in contributing. Julie

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 11:59:17 GMT

Thanks Julie. I know what you mean about the tiredness - it is never ending! It certainly is a difficult time for everybody - the patient; the carer; the family, etc. By the time treatments, docs, tests, etc are done on a regular basis, there really isnt much time for anything else. thanks for taking the time to respond. I spend a lot of time on my pc, I'm not really into TV, and the weather has been so poor here that there isnt much else to do. I live in a VERY small town in rural Vic, so if I cant get outside, for one reason or another, I usually turn to my pc before going insane. I look forward to catching up with you around the discussions. Take it easy. Di

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Jules2 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 12:03:01 GMT

Hey Di Your welcome ... I hope you are keeping dry where you are. Saw on tv tonight that some parts of Victoria are now experiencing flooding. How are all your goats? Julie

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 12:19:07 GMT

This weather is absolutely crazy. I think Mother Nature is fighting back with a vengeance!! We wont be flooded out where we live, but a lot of the roads leading into the area have been closed due to flooding. I think it is just a waiting game over the next few days to see if it gets worse. We have more rain expected, which is not good. My goats are great. They are just the best pets. We have three of them. One is pure white, and the other two are twin Boer goats, with the red head and necks. They are beautiful creatures. They are pets (def not for eating)and are so friendly. I think they think they are dogs. We live in a small rural town and people often stop their cars to pat the goats over the fence. I just love them!

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Jules2 — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 12:55:55 GMT

Di You could be right re mother nature fighting back ... :) I looked after some goats not so long ago and a sheep (sean ... very original). Sean was the last to go and not sure I would ever have goats again, nothing was sacred! Julie

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 00:42:47 GMT

Hi Julie, our goats are in a paddock next to our house, very well contained, as they were wonderful escape artists when we first got them. Now they are happy just to be able to see what is going on in the yard and watch the dogs and people passing. Everytime we go into the yard, they cry like babies for attention. Thats why so many people stop to pat them, they are just so friendly. But you are right when you say nothing is sacred. I accidently left their gate open the other day and the three of them made a bee-line for my garden! not impressed, but hey, it WAS my fault. Di

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

Sqweege — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 02:59:01 GMT

Hi Di!! I agree it's pretty quiet here and I've SOOOO appreciated your responses to my thread :D I love goats, they're adorable! I have 2 dogs who think they're human ... shhhh, don't tell them they're not! ;) Sqweege

Re: TOO FEW RESPONSES!

diannep52 — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 09:41:21 GMT

Hi Sqweege My goats are beautiful, They are all female and I am trying to talk my partner into buying a ram, so that I can breed them. I have found them be just like dogs, they follow us everywhere and just love human company. I know what you mean about the dogs thinking they are human - I have an 8mth old Jack Russell who thinks she owns the house (and, basically she does!!) She is an inside dog at night and outside with our Border Collie of a day. She is a different dog outside, runs around like a lunatic, but once inside, she returns to that little baby, that just has to be nursed continually. I dont care though, I love it!!! I had another Jack Russell - 2 years old, but unfortunately whilst I was in Melb for treatment, she dug a hole and got out onto the main road and was hit by a truck. I was absolutely devastated and I guess I am over protecting little Lilly, I just couldnt bare for anything to happen to her and I do LOVE the attention she gives me. She always has a 'big wet kiss' for me. haha Hope you are doing OK. Di XX