topic Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment in Relationships, sexuality and fertility

Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 03:45:00 GMT

hi, i would like to catch up anyone who is trying to, or has had a baby after their cancer treatment :)

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 06:09:00 GMT

Hi Nikki, How are you? Just logged in here for the first time since the changes & it's much better, really great. You know I can not have any more children after my treatments but Im lucky enough to have my 2 boys and I'm so thankful for them. I dont think its something that is really addressed well enough by doctors when treating a younger person with cancer but obviously it concerns us. Infertility is the most devestating thing to have to deal with when all the treatments are done. I hope you get some more replies. Chat to you soon;

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 21:39:00 GMT

Hi Butterfly, so great to see you here. I agree that the new website is MUCH better than the last one.... and its SO COOL that YACs have a place to call their own here too!! I bet you are so glad to have had your 2 boys already. I totaly agree with you that infertility is such a devastating side effect of YAC cancer treatment, because we are at the age when we are wanting to start or already may have a young family, and so cancer affects us in many long lasting ways. How have you cope with having cancer and 2 young boys. what have been the challenges and rewards of being a young mum? I too get really angry when the docs take away hope for us YAC patients, and tell us that 'you will be infertile from your treatment'. These words are from my own actual case staudy, where I was told this. BUT 7 years down the track from 33 weeks of chemo that did send my body into menapause at age 29 years, I can tell you now that I am 19 weeks pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess i started this forum discussion to share the fab news and offer some hope and inspiration to any YAC out their who is going through treatment, that there is still light at the end of the tunnel, and that you should challenge any doctor that tells you you will be infertile from you treatment. Ask your docs for all information and choices regarding your fertilty before you start any treatment, even idf you are 19 years old... because even if you do not think you want to start a family at age 19, you certainly should have the choice to do so later in life. IT IS YOUR RIGHT! Nikki 🙂

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 22:28:00 GMT

Nikki, That is such fabulous news CONGRATULATIONS!! I had no idea, Im so happy for you. I guess you have proven that pregnancy after chemo is possible. I think chemo can cause temporary menopause, maybe thats what happened with you. It's so nice to hear some nice news & first thing in the morning too!! Did the Doc's say the chances were not good for pregnancy? If they did then, how wrong were they!! I agree the site is so much better and really good to have a whole section dedicated to us YAC's. Butterfly

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 05:18:00 GMT

Hi Nikki, I found it really hard to have the energy to take care of the kids during my treatment especially on my chemo days, but it did have a plus side I guess because I had less time to mope around the place feeling sorry for myself. It was probably the fatigue that was the worst thing, especially because my youngest was only 1 year old. I really struggled with the waking during the night and up early. Really all I wanted to do was sleep, with my partner at work my mother and Aunty were a great help & I think thats really important to be able to accept the help when it's offered. The kids also gave me that extra push I needed to recover and get well again. Im still exhausted all the time now, but I guess most Mums are anyway. There is help out there for woman who need it. I know there are mums with cancer who dont have a partner & my guess is they would really need some extra help. Sleep is probably the most important thing anyone can do when having treatments & if thats hard to come by then you can wind up exhausted! Butterfly

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

jules_jp — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 11:52:00 GMT

CONGRATULATIONS Nikki!That's fantastic news. Thank you too Butterfly for the info on this post - you are truly amazing. I am so interested to hear of younger womens journeys. I was diagnosed at 34 in 2007 (married with no children). I'm coming up to 1 year out of treatment. I'm on tamoxifen and taking Microlut (apparently I'm not supposed to have monthly bleeds). Am yet to have transvag ultrasound and CA125 test so I'm uncertain about my fertility status. I am anxious about this because its a reminder of the diagnosis. I am at a point now where I just want to move on. In a year or so, I plan to stop all pills (being min 2years of tamox) as I will be 37 next year. The Drs told me there was an 80% I could still conceive naturally after treatment and about 70% chance of conception after one cycle of IVF (so I chose the natural option and if I couldn't, then I'd have to accept it at that time). My husband has never been one to push for children, I've had my clucky moments and he said he'd support my decision either way. People who haven't had cancer already have so much to think about in terms of pregnancy and raising a family, so for us survivors/remission - its an obstacle/burden (both physically and mentally) which I'm discovering very few understand.

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 22:21:30 GMT

Hi again Butterfly, yes it is such great news... thanks 🙂 I have my 20 week scan coming up next friday, and to tell you the truth, i have been waiting for this scan before I go fully public with my pregnancy. I just want to make sure everything is OK. If it is, I hope to cover my preganacy journey through the Young Adult blog I will run here on this website. My doc told me straight out that I would be infertile from my treatment, as I did not have time to harvest eggs ect with my chemo starting 24 hours after i was Dx. But the docs never talked to me about fertility options at that stage... they did not explain anything other that "you will be infertile". A year and a half later, I was having 30 hot flushes a day and was on HRT. My cycle started again after I got some herbs from my TCM doc. My cycle and hormones where all over the place for the next few years and the western medicine docs could not tell if i was releasing an egg or not. When the time came in my life last year, my partner and I went on a pre-conception health plan for 6 months before we tried to conceive. We read the book "The natural way to better babies" - by Francesca Naish & Janette Roberts, and followed the many suggestions within this book. Amazingly, we conceived in the first month of trying!! :) n

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 22:31:42 GMT

I can not begin to imagine what it must be like to have such young kids and do cancer at the same time. thank god for the family support you had! Like you said, it must be absolutely tiring for and single mums or dads having to do it alone. I think you also hit the nail on the head, in that your kids gave you the "extra push" to keep going. That was one thing I used to think about when I thought I was infertile.... that i would never experience that connection and love that only a mother and father get from becoming parents. Did your kids pick up on your cancer? did they get upset or scared? if so how did you handle these situations? How did you handle the fatigue? was it hard to ask for help at the beginning so you could rest. Do you still ask for help when you feel tired now? Do you tell other parents what you have been through, so they understand why you feel so tired, as I am sure you are having to deal with more fatigue than the average young parent after all that you have been through both physically and mentally. :) n

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 23:26:56 GMT

Hi misti, thanks for your reply to my topic and your congrats. I certainly do feel really fortunate to have things work out for me the way they have and thats why i want to share this with others like you who are at the stage in life where having children is a key time. It is good to see that you have some postive fertilty stats for your future. I agree with you that raising a family is even more daunting for those who have gone through cancer, and it is hard to find the right health professionals to talk to about this. I see that you are 1 year post Dx and still on Tamoxifen etc... do you currently have a fertility specialist on your treating team? do you have any counsellors that you or your husband can to talk to about your fertility issues? Having to front to any follow-up scans, tests and appointments is an unfortunate and continual reminder of having had cancer. These apponitments for me got easier as time went on, as I got more informed and gained confidence to ask questions. I would always take either my mum or relative with me to all these appointments. we would have a list of questions that we would not leave until they were answered. hope this helps 🙂 n

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Tue, 17 Mar 2009 05:57:13 GMT

Hi Misty & Nikki, Dont get me wrong I know how lucky I am that I had my 2 sons before I was dx with cancer, but we had planned on another & to have that option taken away has been a massive thing for me to have to deal with. Not so much for my husband, he has 2 boys so does not understand, but anyway Im also really thankful to be alive for the 2 I have got and to be around to watch them grow up. I think Nikki's story is the perfect example of how the doctors can get it wrong when it comes to infertility after cancer. Sometimes they just dont know. And Misty I would say those odds you have been given for a pregnancy are pretty good odds' if you decide that's what you want. It is really important to look after yourself & thats one thing I find extremely hard at times, because I just dont have the time. Extra sleep or actually even a little I would probably do just about anything for (I need to learn to get to bed earlier). Take care

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 06:09:13 GMT

Butterfly, it is interesting to know that you would still love the choice to have more children even after already having 2 beautiful boys. I remember wanting a sister, as i had 3 brothers. I am sure I will better understand all this when i become a mum. I would not have realsied this unless you said so. So thanks for sharing this with us. Hope you get to bed early tonight or a sleep in tomorrow 🙂 Sleep is good mmmmmmmm

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Tue, 17 Mar 2009 09:52:16 GMT

When I had my first child I was only 21, so we waited until I was 30 to have our second was hoping for a 3rd & was actually trying when told I had cancer. I know there are many young women & men who can not have their own child & adoption is really not an easy option in our country, which is sad really as there are so many kids who are orphans around the world who would love a home and many Aussies who have had cancer would love to give them a home. Doesnt seem right to me. Im so happy for you Nikki, when do you have your scan? Do you want to find out what youre having? I see a specialist next week for some lumps. My family history for bc is not good with my Mum having had bc twice and my Aunty also so I have to stay on top of these things. I know they will just be cysts (like all the others have been) but still a tad stressful. Do you have any side effects from the tamoxafin Misti? I bet you will be relieved when you can stop taking that. Anyway I will try for that early night tonight. Hopefully we will have others join in here with us soon.

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

MissRen — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 07:17:01 GMT

Hi Ladies, Thanks for being so open and frank. I think this is the perfect forum to do this - Thanks Nikki! When I was diagnosed with breast cancer I went to see a gyno' to discuss IVF treatments. After sitting with him for an hour and listening to 60% this, 80% this, 90% possibility, i felt for me at that time it was a stress that i didn't want to add to the quickly growing list of stresses. The thought of being injected with hormones, harvesting the eggs ect ect was too much. The one figure that stood out was that I had an 80% chance to concieve naturally. I'm more than happy with that! For now my dog is my child and he loves the cuddles and kisses he gets on a regular basis. I told a couple of my friends about my decision to not go ahead with IVF and they could'nt understand why. I explained to them it's like setting goals; you can't do them all at once and you have to look at the importance and impact of each in the short term for the long term. And to seriously ask yourself if you can fully commit to what is required for you to meet your goal. They eventually understood which was great. For now I look forward to buying a new vest for my dogchild. Have a great night everyone and thank you ( :

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

slacker — Wed, 20 May 2009 13:16:24 GMT

So nice to hear everyone's stories about pregnancy and kids. . . I have 2 toddlers and hope to have a 3rd child one day, but my cancer diagnosis last year and subsequent treatment will just mean that gets delayed a bit I hope! My little men have been such an inspiration to keep me up and positive through all this, I love them so much but wow it sure is exhausting to combine cancer treatment and surgery recovery with the nights of broken sleep and days full of kids' activities! Despite that, I'd really love to add a 3rd pair of legs to chase around the house in the near future (o: Congrats on your pregnancy Nikki, looking forward to hear how things progress (hope your first trimester has been smooth sailing!) and look forward to hearing everyone else's stories of bubs and pregnancy too!

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Wed, 20 May 2009 23:05:21 GMT

Hey MissReena, thanks for openly sharing your situation. I too love my dog, she is my best friend and was even smuggled into the RMH 5th floor a few times to see me throughout my treatment :) Whe i was dx and the dr's told me i would not have children, i too thought my doogy cuddles would be fine and perhaps one day i could adopt. i am so lucky to be in my current situation - thats for sure. sounds like you are taking a very balance approach to your fertility issues and I find that some friends at the best of times struggle to understand my cancer related issues. you know whats right and living life with less stress is a good way to go - well done! keep us posted on your future fertility movements and best of luck - nikki

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Wed, 20 May 2009 23:15:32 GMT

Hi Slacker, thanks for your post, it is really nice to hear from another mum. Its funny, but all the young mums and dads who are affected by cancer and who i speak to say a similar thing... that their kids are what keeps them going, but hec its full on tiring stuff being a parent and doing cancer. so well done chick! My pregnancy is going very well thanks. I will do up a post in my blog on this site this week and try and add a pic. My first trimester was hard with working full time, having bad morning sickness and fatigue. I have just entered my 3rd trimester now and feeling fab. i have 2 days/week where i feel tired, but no sickness and lots of kicking and movement from the little man (yes its a boy!). how old are your kids now? nikki

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

slacker — Thu, 21 May 2009 01:58:09 GMT

Ooh, an active little boy...congrats! My boys are 2 and 3.5 now...and they're still as active as they were when they were squirming around in the womb. So glad I've been feeling more and more physically well in the past few months so I can play all the rough n tumble games little boys like to play! Hope you continue to feel great through these last few months, I remember really enjoying being pregnant even when I was 20kg heavier than when I started (yup, my babies liked me to eat a lot of ice cream!) e

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Nikki_YAC — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:50:16 GMT

hi again, wow your boys must keep you fit and busy at that age, well done chick! Mt food choice ATM is home made biscuits and a glass of milk.... its funny i started to put on a few kilos early on in the pregnancy but I have now lost a few. all up i think i have put on 3 kg. i was really worried about this, but the obstetrician said it is normal to have this happen too and my boy is growing well within normal range (just had a scan at 28 weeks) 🙂

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

Vetticus — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 06:45:57 GMT

Hi, Is there anyone who's considered or has gotten pregnant despite having been given a cancer diagnosis with an uncertain prognosis/future? Specifically thinking a malignant Brain tumour, thinking about potential birth defect issues (I'm on an antiseizure medication), the possibility of needing cancer treatments during pregnancy should a recurrence decide to occur then, and also what people think about the whole idea of potentially having a child and then potentially not necessarily being around to be its mother for long enough (whatever "long enough" is)? Just wanting to explore your collective wisdom and thoughts. By way of background I just got given the diagnosis about 3 mths ago, have finished immediate treatments, was told the median expectation according to standard literature could be recurrence in about 3-5 years (though of course I am hoping for the best...dear god can I have a cure please?). I am 32 and currently don't have any kids, but have a wonderful hubby of 1.5 years. What does one do when it's all so hazy? Thanks in advance, Yvette

Re: Pregnancy for Young Adults who had cancer treatment

jules_jp — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 07:25:48 GMT

Pregnancy doesn't have to wait after breast cancer (Dec 2006) - This one includes research done in WA over a 10 year period. http://www.breastcancer.org/tips/fert_preg_adopt/new_research/20061208.jsp Pregnant Women with Breast Cancer Do No Worse than Others(Feb 2009 - a 30 yr study) http://www.breastcancer.org/tips/fert_preg_adopt/new_research/20090209.jsp