An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Tickettyboo
Occasional Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Thankyou  I’ve just joined , it feels good to have this support , as just been feeling a bit wobbly and alone with all my feelings but I’m staying strong 💪 

CaptainAustrali
Super Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Hey There - sorry that you're dealing with cancer.  It's a ghastly, oppressive adversary.  But I think the two most important things it tries to take away from you are your hope and sense of place and certainty.

 

If you try and keep yourself Tickettyboo :), be really protective of your mental health, you'll benefit over the short and longer term.  

 

The uncertainty and fear it tries to inflict on you is a weird one - because we, none of us, know what our expiry date is.   I knew someone in the final weeks of late stage metastasized cancer treatment, palliative care, expected to have less than a month - and with an immunotherapy trial he lived another 3 or 4 years.

 

As the old saying goes "It aint over 'til the fat dude sings"

(changed it to a guy so as not to appear misogynistic 😉   )

 

I think half of the battle is staying emotionally strong, finding your centre.

 

Best of luck, there are plenty of kind and helpful people in this community.

Tickettyboo
Occasional Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Hello, I’m finding this forum rather strange to navigate 🤔🤔 Thanks for reply, and yes, it’s all true , I’m usually very independent and strong, I’m Scottish, and this diagnosis knocked me for six ! Right now I have information overload and seeing Oncologist in 2 weeks with many questions? I’ve helped family friends on this journey, no longer with us 😢 so I reckon I’ve more chance  of surviving without all that poison in my body ! Cheers 😊

Pops
Occasional Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Wonderful story and great words of encouragement Captain!
The feelings of fear and despair can be so overwhelming. It’s lovely to hear your message of hope and it’s not false hope but realistic hope for living our best life with whatever time we have left.
Thank you.
Love and blessings to you
Jilly
debjdavis
Occasional Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Was given three weeks tops with Melanoma stage 4. I went to Germany and they kept me alive until new treatments came through. I am alive but because i was testing the drugs I have been severely affected. No one tells you how people will react. My husband abandoned me. I had no help from anyone financially and used everything I owned and had on medical and being a single Mum who couldn't work. My advice is to do as many nice things as you can. That is what in the end kept me alive.

Hannah30
Occasional Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Thanks for that message CaptainAustrali.  Learned yesterday that my cancer life expectancy average is around two to three years and with a met in my spine things can't expect to end well.  Yes it's the fear and incursion into life plans and hopes that sent me into a slump 

However, I'm not giving up.  

My main upset at present is the Australian COVID mess. My daughters live in Sydney under lockdown ap and I desperately want to see them, especially my 20 year old who is living alone.  I can't go over there from Tasmania and they're not allowed to travel, and not allowed into Tasmania.

Congratulations on beating your prognosis and may any remaining vestiges (if any!!!) die a painful death💥😁

Cheers, Hannah30

 

CaptainAustrali
Super Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Hey Hannah

 

I'm really sorry you're doing it tough.  At exactly the time you need to reach out for your loved ones, you're stuck.  I wonder if you could write to the department of health asking for a compassionate exemption ?

 

It's all quite absurd to me - the thing I can't wrap my head around is .. if over the past week there have been almost a thousand cases diagnosed, how is it there have only been 2 deaths (with pre-existing conditions aged 70+ and 90+) .. I thought the numbers were much less optimistic than that - maybe the darker numbers are based on the health system being overwhelmed and disease without intervention.

 

I may be disremembering the numbers, but I seem to recall there being about 10 suicides per day in Australia this past year.  So the death toll to suicide is therefore up in the thousands.  (Typically < 40 years old).   And yet there's virtually no mention of it in contrast.  I'm honestly puzzled and confused by the world around me these days -- but I'm an old fogey with chemo-brain so I have an excuse to rattle on 🙂

 

COVID killed my successful travel insurance business - and now it's keeping you from your family at a time when you desperately need to be with them.  I'm so sorry.

 

I can't really answer for that stuff - but I can tell you .. the cancer projections are just numbers.  Don't look at 2-3 years as a finite sentence, you might buck the odds.  And if it is the remainder of your life set out in front of you --- squeeze the most love and joy out of those days, weeks, months & years as you possibly can.

 

I wish you the very best - I'm sorry you're doing it tough.  ZOOM isn't as good as an in-the-flesh hug, but I suppose it will have to do for the immediate short term ...

Janine3220
Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Thank you for your loving desire to get the message out.

 

The mind is extremely powerful.

 

( I am a counsellor, psychotherapist and clinical hypnotherapist. FYI I am experiencing temporarily of course breast cancer. My motto: When shit happens, make fertiliser from it, and flourish.)

 

Support as in this forum and from strangers and friends alike, aka love, is all powerful.

 

You are an inspiration to us all.

 

 

CaptainAustrali
Super Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Good morning, All.  Happy Queen's Birthday long weekend, eh ?

 

I just wanted to write and share something that might be a source of hope for you.

 

I know you're probably reading this because you've suffered a blow.  A horrible diagnosis.  You're reeling, just as I was.  I remember that feeling vividly, and I first wrote this "it isn't the end" post in the hopes that I could show you, in a concrete way, that you need to find and hang onto your anchor.  Your hope.

 

The odds of survival were NOT in my favour, but to update, I'm inching extremely close to my 5 year treatment anniversary (already past the anniversary of my diagnosis).  According to the data, my survival & recurrence risk drops to not substantially above the normal population !

 

You got that ?  Five years ago, I was doomed to imminently die.  In a couple of months, I'll be .. well, I wouldn't go so far as say 'back to normal'

 

I won't be able to write then, I'll have a backpack on my shoulder.  I'll be dressed as the boofhead superhero Captain Australia.  I'll be walking from Brisbane to Melbourne, a winding 2400km+ route down the east coastline.  I'll be doing it for The Kids' Cancer Project (I couldn't abide seeing kids waiting for treatment).

 

The Channel 10 show, THE PROJECT did a story on it if you're curious:  https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=283341400051472

 

If we warped back in time, to that moment I sat in that white room, that hospital room, looking aghast at the doctor with the kind eyes, that version of me could NEVER, not EVER have anticipated this future.  This feeling, this solid feeling of hope, survival .. even .... rebirth.

 

What should that tell you ?

 

YOU CAN HAVE IT TOO !!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Fight the fear.  Fight the depression.  Resist until your last breath.  You *can* survive.  You *can* thrive.  Fuck cancer.  You muscle up, pull every little piece of power you have in you, every little shred of spiritual strength, and you go KUNG FU all over this cancer.

 

This isn't the end.

Reply
0 Kudos
Janine3220
Contributor

Re: An important message for you: it isn't the end.

Good Luck! You're a beacon of light and an inspiration!

Reply
0 Kudos
Post new topic
Talk to a health professional
Cancer Council support and information 13 11 20Mon - Fri 9am - 5pm
Cancer Information and Support

Online resources and support

Access information about support services, online resources and a range of other materials.

Caring for someone with cancer?

Find out what resources and support services are available to assist you.