I was supposed to get The News on Tuesday but the receptionist mucked up my appointment - hard to see a doctor at Westmead on the day he has his clinic at Wahroonga. So Thursday became the new day! We were already aware that things were not good my urologist had passed me further up the food chain as he had no experience in dealing with where my cancer was heading. But the cancer was still just a red mark, all be it ugly. not too different from where we'd started 18 months ago and there were ways to deal with it. But then all the choices became one - this is what is going to happen. I remembered how I felt when my wife had her breast cancer scare. I remember being told that no man could possibly understand what it was like to be confronted with loosing a breast, well I must agree but when your faced with loosing your penis just because of an ugly red mark then it becomes too real. Timing is everything, just as I started to feel sorry for myself I read a post online from Sally, my Facebook buddy Sally Obermeder and at the risk of getting a slap from my wife she's looking bloody hot! She beat Cancer, lots of people do so its time to start fighting not feeling sorry for myself. Things are going to be different but not radically so, there are some things I won't be able to do, but without treatment I'd be doing nothing pretty damn soon... So that's the first 24 hours taken care of, my wife is still very emotional but that's also due to the stage of life she's at and that's something I admit I'll never understand but I plan on cramming as much into the next 50 years at the past 50 just with a few less exotic illnesses hopefully.
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