Empty

[missbrookie]

it has been nearly 2 months since I lost my mum to pancreatic cancer and I just feel so lonely without her. I am trying to take one day at time but lately its more like a minute at a time. Some days start so well and then any little thing can trigger my tears. I am so emotional about everything else in my life too, like my job, my friends and also the ex boyfriend that ahs just come back into my life. I don't think it will ever get any easier I just need to find a way to deal with the empty feeling that I have 😞

[kj]

miss brookie I lost my Dad to lung cancer when i was in my teens and for a long time I was lost, in those days there was no such thing as counceling, I wish it was around then,It might be of benefit if you seek some professional help from your GP or else where It may help you cope with the loss of your Mum. kj

[Virginia.F]

Hi missbrookie, I have lost my mum also. It is so hard and although time heals the loss never goes away. It's lots of little things like my grandaughter Hollie will do something and I think "Oh I must tell mum that" then remember I can't, or special occasions that feel less special because mum isn't there. It is early days yet at 2 months. My husband passed away 3 months ago and although I have good days I have plenty of bad ones too. Be kind to yourself, allow yourself to grieve, share it with a friend or sibling if you have one. Above all - baby steps. Don't look too much in the future but take each day at a time. Honour mum by remembering how beautiful she was. Kind & Loving thoughts to you. Virginia x

[SamR]

Hi missbrookie and Virginia, Take it one day at a time and be gentle with yourself, there is no "one size fits all" way of grieving. As KJ said, if it gets too much then talk with your GP, but an important thing to remember is that our loved ones who have passed would not want us to stop living and be miserable, they would want us to be happy and embracing life, in memory of them, especially parents, we are their legacy. I lost my Father from cancer treatment when I was 4 & 1/2 yrs and Dad was 50 yrs, so many times I have longed to be able to share things with him, but I know Dad would be watching on and seeing my journey. So when I'm having a bad day, I think well I'd better get through it, coz this life is a gift to me, from Dad. You were blessed to have a good relationship with your Mum, as I do, so many don't - so cherish the memories and the good times you had ... And one day with time the pain will lessen ... Take care.... Sam

[Martine]

dear missbrookie, my heart goes out to you, my beautiful Mum has been gone for almost 9 years now, from a brain tumor. Not a day goes by that i dont think of her. I miss her terribly. Life, in time, does get easier. I so desperately wish i could tell you that the pain in your heart will get easier too, it eases, somewhat, but it is always there. There is no time limit on grieving, take all the time that you need and want. Just keep your Mum's memory alive within you. Keep pushing forward as im sure that that is what your Mum would have wanted. Take care. x

[missbrookie]

Thanks KJ, yeah I have spoken to 2 different professionals. I just find things are so hard.

[missbrookie]

Hi Virginia, Sorry for your loss :( I know, I had my birthday a few weeks after we lost Mum and it was just so sad, my youngest daughters birthday is next Saturday followed by mothers day sunday. It just seems everything is empty without Mum here to share it. Sorry about the loss of your husband too. I hope your taking care of yourself too and following your wise and kind advice 🙂 Sending hugs to you xo

[missbrookie]

Hi Sam, Yes I am learning that everyone does it differently and trying not to have such high expectations of myself. My Mum would be so sad to see me this upset. I'm sorry you had such a short time with your dad but I'm sure you have special memories. Thank you 🙂

[missbrookie]

Hi Martine, Thank you. I'm sorry for your loss. I am starting to see that the pain will always be in my heart and I will always feel the empty feeling. nothing is the same without Mum to share it. I have eased up on myself and not being as hard on myself when I have bad days. I'm trying really hard to be strong for my girls. Thank you and you too xo