My partner has always had a financially high maintenance family. Sister has problems, can't cope, mum thinks she should be housed and supported because she brought my partner into the world and my partner falls for it.
Anyhow for us it's meant that a lot of his money is going into paying off a home for his mother and sister to live in. I just pay half our living costs and try to keep out of it but do get resentful. Fortunately we own our own home. But when I got diagnosed with cancer I was left pretty much on my own to continue to pay my share of the living costs, gap fees, medications and so forth. There was no conversation about what if I can't work to discuss how to rejig the finances.
Anyhow I managed to work through treatment, the fact I'm a part time worker and my hourly rate is reasonable was helpful but I do harbour a degree of resentment that my partner wasn't there financially for me. If it had of been reversed I would have said take your sick leave on half pay to service the mortgage on the house he's housing mum in but I'll meet all living and other costs (I wouldn't have been able to afford to pay his mortgage as well)
Anyhow treatment has finished and we went on a well deserved holiday to find that sister has gambled away her inheritance (money that if managed properly meant she could have afforded a few nice things, paid for things rather than us having the pressure of being expected to pick up the shortfall) plus took money from his mum's bank account to gamble and no she doesn't want to budget to pay it back, she wants enough money for smokes.
For me this has been a real blow as we'd worked our proverbial off through a very difficult time so my partner could keep housing them. And I had been studying a degree to enable me to remain competitive and earning way into retirement years and was trying to pick that up again.
Any thoughts.
