Looking for support

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Looking for support

Hello, My mother has just been diagnosed (June 25th, 2021) with stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer (Metastasised in lungs and liver). 

aside from pain in her abdomen (she thought it was heart pain), and tiredness she had no other symptoms. She is 77 and as she has experienced chemo before, she is leaning against it this time and instead to enjoy the time with her family without interference. She had stage 4 Non Hodgekins Lymphoma 8 years ago. Today she felt nauseous for the first time. 

I live with my mum, my Dad (healthy 87yo),  my terminally ill brother (45, with End Stage Liver Disease from a 9 year battle with Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis) and my 10 month old daughter (I’m a solo parent). 

my mum and I were the engine room of the household, but now the caring is passed onto me. I am not entirely sure how I will manage to care for 4 plus myself. I have made contact with ‘my aged care’ and that will no doubt help with basics like cleaning and cooking etc, but I know I will need more medical support. 

both my mum and brother want to stay at home as long as possible. Some days I feel unqualified to handle the situation. Yesterday I drove my brother to hospital as he was vomiting and severely jaundiced. My mum aas well enough to mind my daughter, but that may change in the near future. Days like that are rough for us all. I am looking to get an idea on Whom I should call etc. when it gets too much. 

there are so many layers to this situation but what we do have is an abundance of love for each other. 

thankfully my daughter helps us all smile in the darkest of moments, but we have darker days ahead, unfortunately. 

I’m feeling a little overwhelmed, I can’t afford to get too sad as I have too many people that need help. 



Super Contributor

Re: Looking for support

Hello Agma

Oh dear so sad what your Mum and brother are going through and facing,if they aren’t involved yet ,palliative cares involvement may help ease a treatment burden,I can understand your Mums treatment wishes.


Very difficult for you being the main  carer and then trying to keep it all together for the family .You need to keep an eye on your own health also ,possibly a social welfare person employed by the hospital or local council can point you in the right direction ,so that maximum effect can be applied to help you and your family ,also your GP may be able to suggest strategies for you and the rest of your family,

best wishes .


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