When I was diagnosed with breast cancer it worried my sister so she had a mammogram and was diagnosed with breast cancer 3 months after me. I feel sympathy for her about what she will have to go through but more than that I feel resentful that she has taken some of my specialness away. That is a terrible thing to say and I feel very bad about it.
Obviously I do not like having cancer but I don't know how to write this without making it sound confusingly as if I do. I liked that no-one in my family could judge me because I was the only one who had cancer and they didn't know what it was like. I liked having an experience that was mine alone. I liked that they all thought I was brave. Her having cancer too makes me feel less proud of myself for managing my cancer so well. Gosh, I sound like a horrible person.
Also, I have finished chemo and my hair is growing back. She is just starting hers so instead of moving onwards and leaving chemo behind we have to go through it all over again. When can we go back to having lives that don't revolve around cancer?
