Anticipatory Grief

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Anticipatory Grief

My brother was diagnosed 3 months ago with advanced pancreatic cancer, already spread to the liver. He is having palliative chemo and tolerating it reasonably well. I am his older sister and his only family here in Queensland. His children are in Sydney and are of course unable to visit due to Covid. I have multiple myeloma myself but am reasonably well. It’s a 2 hour trip to his home from mine and I have been doing this weekly since first diagnosed. I have been taking him to all appointments, and stay from 1 day to 5 days each week. He attends Tweed Hospital in NSW (lives in Coolangatta) and I no longer can take him to appointments due to border restrictions. I am struggling badly with grief. We are very close and I hate that he will die very soon. It’s affecting my every day life badly, I cry heaps and I hate it. If I am like this now, I’m so worried about how I will be when he does die.

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