Hi Steve, l read your comment and it prompted me to register so that I could comment and hopefully help somebody going through a tough time. I am a lung cancer survivor. It was not caused by cigarettes or cigars, but by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Cancer is a very lonely path to walk and in my case (like many) many “friends” fled the scene as soon as I was diagnosed. Not only are you having to deal with a life threatening disease, but your judgement (when it comes to the “friends” you had chosen) is also questioned by yourself. How could you be so wrong?Couple that with the feeling of rejection (as if I were a defective part) and being let down by so many “friends” (some I had known since childhood) truly amplified the shock of my new reality. As I went through surgery and chemo, things did get better and I learnt that even in a extremely difficult situation, there is always positive things that you can sieze upon and build a future with. Yes cancer sucks and most people do not understand what we are going through or have been through. Most people do not understand the concerns one has when a mysterious pain appears or when you are not feeling well, but it is part of the new normal as is keeping a cool head. I decided that even though cancer sucks, it does also give you a blueprint of who your true friends are. Most people go through their entire life with no clue. By seeing the friends that I had that stuck around and also the new friends I made, I have true friends and so do you. It is better to have quality than quantity and that also applies to friends. Once my imminent death was not to be, some old “friends” attempted to make a come back, but unfortunately the cracks in those relationships are now so deep that it is not worth the effort and work of a full restoration. Now you can remain angry and bitter towards those people that dropped you and disappeared in your time of need, but that only impacts your life and your future. The best way forward is to forgive, but not forget. The best way forward is not to blame yourself. The best way forward is to realize that the friends you now have around you are the only ones worth keeping.
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Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.