Hi. 4.20am. Cant sleep. Thanks 4 ur replies. It is looking like i might have 2 go back in2 surgery. I have pain & am not coping with all this. I should never have agreed 2 the operation. I was doing ok. I lie here thinking, i survivef cancer (for now) and this will probably fimish me off. A little dramatic - maybe - but the tears are coming again and i feel so alone amd as if noone understands. This was supposed 2 b an easy procedure. I feel as if i am jinxed, as if maybe this is my time. I need 2 stop now. Im being silly . There are so many people out there so much worse off than me. I will try and sleep . I just want 2 go home & cuddle my cats. You would think that after all the cancer treatment this would be easy - but i am being a real sook at times and shaking when they come near me to treat me. My pain thresh hold is nil. Thanks again 4 letting me talk. It calms me down cause i feel like im chatting (whinging) 2 friends who do understand & dont judge me as being a little crazy ( even if i am) I hope u all slept well and have a good day whereever u are. All the best and thankyou again for listening, Willow xo
