I thought Rob getting cancer was as bad as it could get but it seems the universe really wants to keep on testing me and how much I can take. I am scared that this time, I'm not up to the task. I lost my job on Monday. Although classified as a casual worker, last year my company offered me a full time permanent position. I did the medical (I strained my shoulder in the process) and they did all my reference checks, it was just a matter of waiting over Christmas for head office to do all the necessary paperwork. This company is renowned for being quite slow in the recruitment process however after Christmas was over, I asked when things would be finalised. I just wanted some stability and security with everything else going on and they are quite aware of Robs cancer and our situation. Nothing had been finalised yet it seems. Sitting at home on Monday (I get Mondays off because I work Saturdays instead), I got a call telling me not to come in the next day, there isn't enough work. They don't know when they'll be calling me back and therefore I don't get paid in the meantime. Funny thing is, I know this is crap as I've had plenty of work up until this point (I'm multiskilled across a few peoples positions). I know the industry is quiet but there is work to do. To make matters worse, Rob's ex has decided she wants more child support for their son. She complained to CSA who lodged an enquiry and now as a result, Rob has to pay a bigger chunk which we can't afford. We found out the CSA's decision on Monday morning. I have literally cried buckets in complete frustration and anger at the total ineptitude of our judicial system. Now that I am not earning, Rob and I are in extreme dire straits financially. Basically, we can't afford to live. To cap it all off, Centrelink will not let me apply for the dole because Rob earns far too much (he's a public servant). We can barely afford Rob's chemo drugs! I don't know what to do. I've never been out of a job for long as my skills are strong but in the event I am unable to find something, we have nothing to fall back on - savings have been depleted due to fighting this shitty disease and everything that goes with it. The pressure is almost near on breaking me. Oh and Rob goes for his first CT since chemo started next Wednesday. I am beyond petrified. Please God, please let him be ok. I don't care if I end up homeless, don't let me lose my husband too. How do I get through this? What do I do? Where do I go when no-one else will help us? How do I keep it together when I'm wreck from all the stress? I don't know what to do.
16 Comments
Contributor
Jo, I really feel for you. That is the very last thing that you need to deal with right now. I am sorry. Got nothing to suggest as solutions, sorry about that too. Hope you can find some relief from the pressure and some options real soon. Best of luck and thinking of you both, Jill
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Contributor
Awww Jill, thank you. I just feel better getting it all down and out. I've been dealt so many crappy hands the past few years, I'm just wondering if it will ever end. I'll get through this somehow - thank you for your support and thoughts. It makes the world of difference. Jo xxx
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Contributor
Jo, Unfortunately I cannot offer any solutions to your horrid horrible dilemma. All I can offer is my heartfelt best wishes to you and Rob. I can understand your worry about the CT Scan - I had my first scan after 3 months of chemo, last week,and if anyone had read my blogs prior to the scan - one totally obsessed paranoid woman!!! As it worked out there was no change from the original scans - so I did what I do best - totally freaked out and panicked- then to discover that while the tumors on my liver had not gone or shrunk - there were no more showing up!!So it was good news after all. I will be thinking of you both and I do hope something really good happens for you both.
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Super Contributor
Hey Jo, I am under similar sorts of stress at the moment. Somehow you do make it through and i know you will. To lose your job at a time like this is tough!!! Can you approach the csa and explain your current situation and see if they can alter their decision? I know thats gonna be a slow process but maybe worth a try. Really, the world just needs to stop when someone has cancer and yet it doesnt. We have to deal with so many things on top of our diagnosis. I really do empathise with your situation and hopefully you will get a new job soon. Use the time you have off to catch up on some you time. :) Julie xoxo
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Contributor
Hi Sorry no instant fixes but I wish you and your partner better times ahead. Sending positive vibes your way for a new job soon and for a reduction in your stress levels. Take time to breathe. Sangeeta
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Regular Contributor
Hi Jo, Not sure if this is the right thing to suggest but I know that there are Social Workers with Centrelink. Might it be worth talking to them as maybe there are short term solutions that may not be readily accessible to the person in the front office? Other than that nothing else to suggest I'm sorry except that I'm sending you and Rob cyberhugs and lots of positive thoughts for the scans. Hang in there, Samex
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Contributor
Hey Jo, Hope things get easier for you. Alana
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Contributor
Hey Alana Thanks for lending an ear. Jo xxx
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Contributor
Thanks for your support everyone. It really is appreciated. I'm feeling better today, not in so much shock although I'm still furious. Starting looking for work and thankfully, the web design business that Rob and I run will bring in some money shortly. I'm sure we'll be ok - I just have to get on with things and make it happen 🙂 Have an interview on Friday for some temp work so fingers crossed, I'll have work again soon. Jo xxx
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Deceased
Hi There The suggestion of Samex to see the social workers at centrelink is a good one, and ask them about you getting the carers payment. Not the carers allowance which is a pittance, but the cares payment which is about the same rate as the disability pension. Whilst it is technically for caring for a disabled adult and there is a disability assessment, there are precedents and last year the Commonwealth Ombudsman hammered centrelink over its treatment of people affected by cancer. So see the centrelink social worker and ask Cheers Sailor I think the sea has thrown itself upon me and been answered, at least in part, and I believe I am a little changed - not essentially, but changed and transubstantiated as anyone is who has asked a question and been answered. Hart Crane
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Contributor
Hi Sailor I did think about her suggestion and thank you for re-iterating it. Rob and I are going to go down to Centrelink tomorrow and see if we can see a social worker to help us. Hopefully, when we explain our situation, they will be able to organise something to help us. Thank you so much for your suggestions! Jo xxx
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Occasional Contributor
Dear Jo, I really feel for you. Why is it that when things go bad all the crap just lands on top? You must be so stressed. Your dimemma reminds me of the week before I was diagnosed. I was so sick, I could barely stand and Centrelink wouldn't let me have a healthcare card as my husband earned too much and I had to buy antibiotics.Honestly, I really feel for people like you, and other cancer patients that have to work throughout chemo as they can't afford not to. What is the world coming to? Really hope things work out. Joyhoney
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Occasional Contributor
Hi Jo, I too am sorry at your predicament. I hope that some solution appears. Yes, it is really great to share what is happening as it takes some load of the mind. Hope that the scans go well on Wednesday, it is a very scary time for both of you. We will all be thinking of you and sending kind thoughts. All I can say is hang in there until next Wednesday. craftyone
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Contributor
Thanks everyone for your support. It's all I was really looking for (along with venting my spleen!) as I figured the universe would provide a solution somewhere along the line. And it has, well sort of. Today, I received a letter from my solicitors in regards to my litigation with the TAC. I have been granted a serious injury certificate which allows me to sue under common law. Hopefully, come April, this whole messy ordeal will be behind me and I will receive a compensation payout. I still need to find a job but at least I got *some* good news this week. At this stage, I'll take anything I can get 🙂
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Contributor
Hi Jo, How's it all going? Any luck with the job situation? Jill.
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Contributor
Hey Jill Yeah things are going ok. How about you? I've got some temp part time work for the moment to get us by until I find something a little more permanent. It's not full time but it's better than nothing and takes a bit of the strain off! Hope you're doing ok Jo xxx
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