It's always there- it never leaves me. I find that whatever else I am doing or thinking about, it's there- in the background perhaps but somewhere in my consciousness, and as soon as I stop busying myself with anything else it floods into the foreground, it takes over if I give it a chance. I think about it an awful lot, I mean in the sense of giving it my full attention. Everything in life is now slightly darkened and the point seems to have gone out of some things altogether. But I've got to accept it because I've got no alternative. SAME - Me on my husband Nick's death, Jan 2013.
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