Its been 11 days since I lost my husband of 35 years to pancreatic cancer that spread to the bones, we've been together for 42 years, we were high school sweethearts. I don't know how to go on without him, He fought so hard to stay alive, I know he did it for me, he was worried that I wouldn't continue to live, I promised him I would take care of myself and I would be okay. I lied, I did that so he could pass and the suffering he endured would stop.
I love him so much. He loved life and people loved him. I can't imagine living without him. I envy people who are divorced and hate their former partner. I can't sleep or eat. People tell me it will get easier, I think they are lying like I did. I want to believe that I will see him again, touch him, feel his arms around me, hold hands.
That's all I have to hold on to.
Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.