Lung Cancer

New Contributor

Lung Cancer

Our son was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer 2 years ago when he was 40 and had just become a father.  Despite numerous visits, my husband and I relocated from our home to be nearer to him 8 months ago as he has no other family close by.  As other treatments have ceased working he is now on palliative chemotherapy and we are caring for our grandchild 3 days a week.  Is anyone else in a similar situation - grieving son's diagnosis, caring for toddler, living a long way from home and other family and friends?

Regular Contributor

Re: Lung Cancer

Hi Vicky,


You're in a very difficult situation.  I'm really sorry.  It must be heart breaking to see your son deteriorating and trying to keep on a brave face for his children.  You must be exhausted!  Young children are hard work and I think our children often forget we're much older now looking after their children.  As joyous as grand parenting is, be careful of your health right now and that of your husband's.  I have not been in your situation but the mother of one of my grandson's developed stomach cancer during Covid.  It was a terrible time and only her mother was allowed in the hospital with her as she died.  It was a terrible shock to us all and even her son who was under 18 was not permitted to see her.  From a distance we grieved and only 5 people were allowed at her funeral.  


You're also isolated and away from you support network of family and friends.  That's incredibly hard.

Just be gentle with yourself and your husband.  Nothing can prepare you for the emotions of your situation.  Eat well, sleep well and rest when you can.  You both have to look after yourselves or you will not be able to help your son during this time of crisis.  


I wish you both well and hope you can find some light in your darkest time. x

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