Mother newly diagnosed with breast cancer.

[RosieRebel]

Hi everyone, I'm new to the forum. Just at the beginning of all this and it's sort of a headspin. My mother has very recently been diagnosed with breast cancer after finding a lump. She's had the biopsy to confirm; a 3cm lump, spread to the lymph nodes. We're still waiting on the bone scan to determine stage/whether the cancer has spread anywhere else and I'm feeling really anxious about it all. I know that most statistics are in her favour but I can't help thinking 'stage 4, stage 4, stage 4'over and over again. Would love to hear about people's coping strategies for the early days, especially when this is so new and we're learning as we go. Thanks in advance. 

[iloveyoudearly7]

Hi Rosie,

May I recommend the following?

Emotion Focused Coping Plan: Involves trying to reduce the negative emotional responses associated with stress, anxiety, depression and etc. This method is helpful to clear the mind so the individual can think more clearly.

• Physical exercise e.g. Running can help clear the mind
• Having a warm relaxing bath and letting the muscles loosen up
• Find comfort within yourself e.g. Give yourself a pep talk in front of an mirror, this has been known to reinforce positive thought patterns.
• Emotional disclosure – Express yourself through writing or talking, keep an journal
• Meditation
• Reading an novel
• Listen to music
• -Play with a pet
• Listen to music
• Draw

Problem Focused Coping Plan: This method is typically more distracting or proactive in manner. It’s usually used to change aspects about the situation you’re in; this can exact to how you receive support for example.

• Finding the ideal support method for yourself e.g. Arranging to see an support group
• Establish healthy boundaries – what can you change in your life? Eat healthier, spend more time outside e.g. gardening or see family more. (Or cut off someone toxic from your life).
• Work on managing time
• Create a to-do-list – what needs to be cleaned up around the house or start a mini project.

But you need to find what best works for you, maybe simply speaking and spending time with your mother/family can provide the comfort or distraction your after. Just being involved in the general process can provide comfort. (I use to admire paintings myself, more specifically the expressionism and impressionism fields. It was easy to lose yourself in the wispy reflected tones and playful lighting).

Please let us know, how it goes??