am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

Hi Kirri, I'm watching my Mum of 66 deteriorate in front of my eyes too. She was once someone who helped me and now I'm her primary carer and it's hard for both of us. Her cancer is terminal and its just a waiting thing now. Not many people know what to say but they try. They only people who make a difference at the moment are palliative care. Not only do they understand, they help me with grief counselling. I wouldn't cope so well without that. They say it gets better. Lets wait and see.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

Thanks for sharing your situation with me. I can definitely see some similarities. I'm so glad that you feel understood by the palliative care team. That must be a relief for you somewhat. Feel free to email me in private if you would like to share more of anything with me. At the moment my father is just losing a lot of weight, but he is not in pain - yet. I think it's the waiting game that hurts the most right now. It is very hard but at least he is not in pain. Thanks again.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Highlighted
Occasional Contributor

Re: am caring for Dad, feeling very alone

I have the palliative nurse come regularly. She is amazing and organizes a lot of help for my mum and myself, her carer. At first I thought I could do it all by myself, how wrong and silly I was. I was strong and idealistic but realized really quick that I'm alone doing all this and then my mum changed dramatically emotionally and mentally plus physically. It is a long drain for me, I also have nobody to talk to. Somebody mentioned grief couselling, via palliative, is that like a social worker? I feel the same as you, watching my mum deteriorate daily before my eyes. Notonly that but my life has to, don't qualify for carers allowance as my mums palliative, nobody else helps me. I can't work as I have to look after her 24/7./ Life sucks.
Reply
0 Kudos
Post new topic
Talk to a health professional
Cancer Council support and information 13 11 20Mon - Fri 9am - 5pm
Cancer Information and Support

Online resources and support

Access information about support services, online resources and a range of other materials.

Caring for someone with cancer?

Find out what resources and support services are available to assist you.