tiki91
I can't begin to understand the feelings of not only grief but a terrible despair of what you observed happening to your grandfather in the final stages of his illness.
however I to am a grandfather also suffering cancer but I can truly say I enjoy the pleasure of my teenage grandchildren around me and the love and compassion they show to me during this time, we always say I love you.
Know that he would have been extremely proud for the sacrifices you made and the great enjoyment and love you gave him during his illness and lifetime. Keep those memories of him forever in your heart as long as his memories are in your heart he lives on with you forever.
I am extremely glad that you are seeing a psychologist you need to completely open up about your feelings, sights and thoughts you are having at this very emotional and trying time.They will hopefully show you the tools you need to help you cope. I am sitting here and shed a quiet tear for you after reading your post for what you are enduring best wishes
kj
