Hi Unsure,
It is a very confusing time. As time has passed since your first posting, I am hoping that things have become much clearer for you all. My Mum was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2012. She had a successful lobectomy, followed by chemotherapy and targeted radiation as some cancer cells were detected in her lymph nodes. She was just starting to get back to normal with clear lung scans, when they discovered a brain tumour in 2014. More surgery and then intensive whole brain radiation therapy , a very exhausting and life altering experience from which she is still recovering.
Try to be involved as you can in your Dad's care and appointments. Sometimes it will be difficult for him to take in information, particularly if he has chemo. Everyone handles things differently. Chemo and radiotherapy were very hard on my Mum-physically and emotionally. But just like every cancer has unique characteristics, so does the treatment and the body's reaction to it. Your Dad may pretend he is fine. He may be fine. Or he may completely fall apart and become incredibly dependent. Ask lots of questions of his doctors, nurses and the myriad of specialists he will probably acquire for oncology, radiology , physiotherapy, chemotherapy, respiratory..Of one thing I am sure, having walked some of your journey, don't miss an opportunity to be there for him. It may be tough, and there may continue to be times when you feel unsure and helpless, there will be times when you grieve the former healthy version of your Dad and wish he were back. But you can do it. Try not to project too far into the future unless there are big changes you need to consider. Just be in the moment with him.
