Unsure and Feeling Numb

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Unsure and Feeling Numb

Hi, my father who is 68 years of age has just been informed after a CT scan that he has 4cm defined lesion at the right upper lobe of his lung. The report also indicates that his lymph nodes are abnormal measuring 10mm and 15mm. It concludes by saying that the lesion is suspicious and that there is evidence of ipsilateral hilar and mediastinal metastases. Of course that does not mean a lot to use but we consider that it’s serious. He has been referred to a general physician to determine what is happening and the wait is quite stressing. He is a private patient but they are saying it could take a week to get an appointment. We are confused about what to do about plans we had over the next six months and whether to cancel them or just sit back now and wait to see what happens. We are all just feeling numb and helpless. I am wondering what this means and don’t want anybody to hold back any punches as I need the truth of what he is facing. If you can provide us with more information that would be great. I am sorry to post this but just feeling numb and helpless.
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Re: Unsure and Feeling Numb

Hi Unsure, It is a very confusing time. As time has passed since your first posting, I am hoping that things have become much clearer for you all. My Mum was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2012. She had a successful lobectomy, followed by chemotherapy and targeted radiation as some cancer cells were detected in her lymph nodes. She was just starting to get back to normal with clear lung scans, when they discovered a brain tumour in 2014. More surgery and then intensive whole brain radiation therapy , a very exhausting and life altering experience from which she is still recovering. Try to be involved as you can in your Dad's care and appointments. Sometimes it will be difficult for him to take in information, particularly if he has chemo. Everyone handles things differently. Chemo and radiotherapy were very hard on my Mum-physically and emotionally. But just like every cancer has unique characteristics, so does the treatment and the body's reaction to it. Your Dad may pretend he is fine. He may be fine. Or he may completely fall apart and become incredibly dependent. Ask lots of questions of his doctors, nurses and the myriad of specialists he will probably acquire for oncology, radiology , physiotherapy, chemotherapy, respiratory..Of one thing I am sure, having walked some of your journey, don't miss an opportunity to be there for him. It may be tough, and there may continue to be times when you feel unsure and helpless, there will be times when you grieve the former healthy version of your Dad and wish he were back. But you can do it. Try not to project too far into the future unless there are big changes you need to consider. Just be in the moment with him.
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Re: Unsure and Feeling Numb

Thanks for your reply Free, yes time has passed and we are are clear as we can be at this time. Dad has commenced treatment, six weeks of radiation therapy combined with one day a week chemo. Two weeks in he is doing well and I've been amazed by his appetite! I'm expecting him to become tired and unwell at some point but it hasn't happened yet. No one in rage medical profession is talking cure or life expectancy. They talk positive about him having some time left Si I guess that's a positive.
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Re: Unsure and Feeling Numb

Hope your Dad is still doing well. With an appetite- that's so wonderful! My Mum was usually okay with treatment for the first few weeks, then started to struggle. Towards the end of her chemo she was experiencing anticipatory nausea. The thought of the nausea that chemo would bring her was making her vomit before the treatment even started. But everyone's chemo is so different. I am so glad you are surrounded by such positivity, it makes such a difference allowing you to stay in the moment taking one day at a time. Take care.
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