Feeling alone

[lynn1ed2]

It has been almost 5 months since I lost my Ed - he was my love, my life and my best friend. I still miss him every day and some days it is okay when I don't think about him too much but today it is not. The pain has not gone away. He died of lung cancer 3 months after diagnosis... much too quickly, I wasn't ready and I'm still not sure that he was. After he died I looked in vain for a bereavement group of people who were feeling as I was but sadly was unable to find one. I have a doctor and counsellor to talk to but I think it would be good to hear from someone who feels as I do and has experienced something similar.

[Chrisandlisa12]

Hi Lynn , i know your pain :( i lost my love - Chris to lung cancer just 5 weeks ago . he was diagnosed just 2 months and 1 day and then he passed away. He was only 56 i am so lonely i am so sad i cant stop being sad i cant sleep i eat badly i have 3 children 10 - 19 -23 i have to be strong its so hard i have no one but my kids i havent spoken to any one i know your pain

[lynn1ed2]

It's good to hear from someone who understands the sadness and pain I have been feeling. Only someone who has lost their love so young and so quickly can possibly understand. I still find myself forgetting that he's gone. I keep reliving his final few days and it has helped to talk to Ed's G.P. and also to a counsellor - but nothing takes away the feeling of loss and pain. I have found that it helps to keep talking to friends and neighbours and maybe join a Yoga class or exercise class - I have chosen exercise and it does help to get me out of the house. I was told that only time will help ease the pain and so far it has helped a little but the grief returns and I don't expect that to change - I will always love and miss him.

[Susy]

Hi. . I am going thru lung cancer ( my husband). Have you heard of the group called Solace? A friend of mine highly recommended it to me if my husband passes away....she attends , says it has given her so much comfort. I am caring for my husband now,,,,,it is really awful..... I feel very alone too.....

[Chrisandlisa12]

Hi Susy I know how you feel it was the hardest thing i have ever had to do i am struggling now to look beyond the final few weeks of Chris' life it made such in impact on me i want the great memories of our 25 years together to come back to me instead of clouding my thoughts with bad ones are you caring for him at home ? do you have home nurses coming to help you ? Are you prepared for the final days ? I feel like i wasnt as prepared as i thought i was i would love to hear back from you to help you through it you are in my thoughts take care

[Susy]

Dear Lynn. That is just too sad altogether for you ,,, I feel your pain,,, My husband just went in to hospital with high blood pressure one night and next morning was diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer! That was August last year. I was devastated....and cried for weeks,,,, He is still with me, And has not had to have chemo for 2 months as the tumours shrank... But,,,,,,,we both know that this is not going to be the end of it..... I wonder if you have Solace group where you live?...try to find Solace,,,,it is the most wonderful group for grieving people.... I will be heading there when the time comes... Love and light to you,,,,,Susy

[lynn1ed2]

Hi ChrisandLisa12 and Susy, Thanks for your thoughts and feelings. It is comforting somehow to know that others feel as you do. Lung cancer is such a terrible disease. I read a lot about it when Ed was diagnosed and sadly there was not much hope to be found. He didn't want to read about it at all. And I too am struggling to remember all the good times - most of my thoughts are about the final weeks and months of his life. But I hope this will change and I will be able to remember the fun we had together - we had over 34 wonderful years. I've been invited by friends to travel to Germany where we spent nearly 20 years off and on when he was working there and am finding it hard to make the commitment to go because he won't be there with me. My thoughts are with everyone who is going through this pain and confusion - it does help to share. Love to you all, Lynn.