I guess it's normal to be sad and angry at the same time

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I guess it's normal to be sad and angry at the same time

I am 52 years old. My husband passed away 8th July from secondary bowel cancer in the lungs. Everything was going well - chemo every week for 105 consecutive weeks. Kept the tumours at bay. Lost voice and went into hospital after having rapid AF. Two weeks later told he had 3 weeks to live. On Sat 5th July we married in the hospital chapel. Two days later he passed away. The quickness of what happened has devastated me. Being with him when he passed away haunts me every day. I keep busy with all our kids and work but at night I am so lonely and keep seeing his last moments. I guess I need help.
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Re: I guess it's normal to be sad and angry at the same time

Hi Kezzybear, I just had to reply to you, because as soon as I read your title I just thought "Hell yeah!". I'm so sorry you had to go through this- it does sound shockingly fast, too. Keep in touch, love Emily
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Re: I guess it's normal to be sad and angry at the same time

Hi Emily, thank you for your comment. Yes it was fast, especially when we had made so many plans and had just returned from a great holiday in NZ and he looked so well and content. I am sad because he is gone and angry that this horrible disease ruins so many lives and we had so many dreams that will never eventuate. If you ever need to vent I am here for anyone. I know how hard it is to express yourself to people who ask "how are you doing", "it gets easier". Unless you have gone through it you just don't understand the different emotions. And no I am not "doing" well and it feels like it won't get easier. Hugs to you. Kerryn
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