Lost my best friend.....and losing again....my Dad......

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Lost my best friend.....and losing again....my Dad......

I sat there yesterday with my poor Dad.... 3years on with multiple myeloma. Nearly half the weight he was...face gaunt....grey. I cried my heart out as they took him off for his daily radio therapy. Its very hard.... i really don't want to see my Dad looking worse than he is now.... its breaking my heart...as well as my mum and sister. Each time we see him he looks worse...now off food..just trying to think of things to give him. My Dad got worse last November when he fell in the bath....broke his back then he started to go down hill from there.Dads also starting to get confused....all the medications etc. I decided yesterday that i needed to talk to him about the future...when the time comes...what he wants and doesn't want. Broke my heart and Dad also got upset ...but we kept it very brief. I lost my dearest friend in February after fighting first breast cancer 7 years ago...the two years ago was diagnosed with breast and bone mets. Tried to support my friend and gradually watch her change in front of me as this gastly disease took hold!!! I'm not sure why im on this....its not about me .... its about my Dad now....but I just feel... incredibly anxious at times....awfully sad.....i need constant distractions to make me forget for a while. I have great support with my husband...but I'm sure he must be sick of me crying and the kids ha! I suppose I'm here for advice??? The end of my Dads life...... is there anything I should do????? not do??? Thanks anyway if you take the time to read this spiel.
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