Hi my name is Nicole and I lost my mum 3 months ago. She was only 56 and had lung cancer which spread to her spine, brain and bones. I am only 29 and have two young children 3 and 6 months. I am really struggling with things and would like to hear from others who have lost love ones.
I haven't lost my father yet but we are not far from the end according to his dr's. I am beside myself with grief and pain, although he is still here I think I know how hard it must be for you, and I am dreading the pain getting worse with his loss, if it can get any worse. I am not religious and I don't know where I stand, especially in the circumstances, but I hold you in my thought and hope that your pain eases with time.
Hold on to the memories and find yourself support, be it a friend, a relative, a support group, or as I found out today and simple call the cancer council had me get myself together enough to be able to drive home.
When mum passed away on Christmas Eve I was sad but relieved. She was finally free from pain. The last couple of weeks before she passed were the hardest. It's has all just kicked in now as everyone has gone back to normal no one asking how you are. This is the time support is needed.
Sorry to hear about your dad. How old is he? Make sure you tell him you love him and he is pain free. Cancer is the worst and no one deserves to go through it. I wish you all the best and hope you can get through this, which I'm sure you will. I'm always here if you wanna have a chat.
4 months ago I lost my Nan, she was like my mother and had helped raise me my whole life.
In January 2011 she was diagnosed with breast cancer, and 12 months of chemo and radiation followed. In 2012 she was diagnosed with secondary liver and lung cancer. She was admitted to hospital 2 months after being diagnosed, and was there for a month. For the last 2 weeks my mum and I slept there multiple times because she could have gone at any time. It was traumatic seeing her in the state she was in, she was in pain, confused and unsettled, but she truly is in a better place now. Although she was much older then your mother, she was perfectly healthy before hand so it was just as surprising for us.
Time does help, I still cry but it's much less often, and I've started uni and started to move past my grief a little.
I hope it becomes a little easier for you to, grief is exhausting and consuming, but it will get better.
Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.