Really good points, I think because I’m Stage II that the cancer isn’t contained to just my uterus but I’ll check, it’s all a whole new language to me. I see what you mean regarding exposure, I hadn’t even thought if that- so I’ll ask the specialist tomorrow. Because my cancer had no outward physical signs or symptoms and how they found it was fluke, I’m probably being super paranoid or hyper vigilant which is to be expected I suppose. Thanks again for getting back to me so quickly,
How has today been? I have spent a bit of time talking to friends today which had me feeling almost normal for a few hours but I have come crashing back to reality now. I went to the shops today to get a few things for hospital and I struggled to hold back the tears and raced home to hide again.
The rollercoaster ride sure ain't one I would recommend. I hope your doing ok today.
how are you feeling today? I’ve been not too bad, I had a dear friend come by on the weekend to help my husband with the veggie garden, while I cooked dinner. It took twice as long to do and I was just unable to function after because of tiredness, so that was a bit of a reality check for me. I’m coping ok, as background my husband is Tibetan -and was a Buddhist monk for 19 years. Together we run a meditation school (www.facebook.com/lojongmeditation) so I feel like the practice is keeping me calm. I’ve woken a few times in the morning in a hysterical mess, but I think that’s ok. It’s all okay to cope how we need to, and be upset or angry, sad, scared. I think the main thing is being able to talk about it, and so I just wanted to say again- thankyou- Im so thankful to you for sharing where you are at, in all it’s rawness, it’s a comfort even though it’s totally crap to be going through. Also, I’m here if you do need to vent, scream, commiserate, laugh at the ridiculousness of it, whatever xxx tomorrow I have ECG, another specialist appointment, then Wednesday it’s CT, Thursday anaesthetics and next Tuesday, surgery. How about you? What’s next? Xxx
I'm really sorry about your diagnosis but I also know that we have incredible doctors, surgeons and hospitals in this country who will provide you with the best care amd hopefully you have an amazing outcome. Yes, we do worry about how it's going to affect everyone else in our lives. I was incredibly anxious before every doctor's appointment even if I knew it was just for a script. It came from history as a child that I'd never been able to overcome. With my diagnosis, my anxiety was incredibly high. Someone told me to tell myself - it will be over by lunchtime, or dinner time. Give yourself an end time for the anxiety. I found that helped me greatly. One step at a time.
I just told my family and a few close friends. That was hard enough. (I don't have your diagnosis though). There came a point where I couldn't talk about it anymore to anyone, possibly just my husband. I stopped answering my mobile and then my husband would ring people back and tell them that I wasnt up to talking at the moment but would contact them at a later stage. You also have to protct yourself. It's really tough news and it takes ages to sink in fully. I looked for things that gave me hope. Naturopath appointment helped greatly as too what I could do to be as strong and as fit as I could possibly be before surgery. I knew I wouldn't be able to eat normal food, only very soft food aftweards so bought some books - I think one was the Cancer Kitchen and made bone broths, miracle broths and chicken broths. Many of these I've had fpr breakfast, lunch and dinner and will continue to for some months yet. Lots of research and watched everything I could like the film The C Word, Heal and Weed the People. Anything that keeps you positive is important. Find what that is for you. Small projects to complete before surgery, or setting up things for comfort and ease post surgery are also really important. I hope you have a fantastic outcome.
It's a horrible place to be in right now. The diagnosis is a bit isolating because of the shock. Once you have a plan of action organised, I hope you will feel better about what is ahead of you. I found reading other people's stories helped me greatly leading up to my surgery. Diary can help too. Shoppingfor new pjs helped. Choosing a special perfume also helped. I used one that my mother had loved and asked me to buy some for her when she was in a nursing home. She died last year and I had never worn the perfume since. I bought some and every time I put it on I imagined my mother with me, giving me her strength and courage to get through what was ahead of me. I think these forums are good too because we can talk with others and not feel as if we are burdening partners and children. There are many people on the same journey and hopefully we can share our experiences and knowledge to help each other. Good luck with everything.
thankyou for reaching out- I reckon you’re right, knowing what the plan is will definitely help. I’ve been reading the stories on here, and it’s so comforting to know I’m not alone- none of us are. We’re all cancer kin now, a giant army connected by unspoken hope. Next step is surgery, and then recovery. Until then it’s prep and just talking. I so appreciate you taking the time to share your experience, please stay in touch x I’ll keep you posted
Hey Lampwork, I quickly checked out your profile, you’ve been through a hell of a lot- how are you feeling in recovery now? I’ve definitely been focusing on little projects- we have a burgeoning veggie garden that is feeding me great organic food but is also so peaceful to be in. Agree with putting some boundaries in place- for sanity if nothing else. It’s all still sinking in- slowly. Tomorrow comes with more news, my initial come biopsy was sent off for a second opinion, so I expect my diagnosis will be further updated- but I’m not sure. It’s the not knowing that sucks, but that I’ll have to get used to. I hope today is a good one for you xx
I was hoping to offer some supportive words, but reading your replies so far, you've already got more than I can offer. In fact, the opposite has happened, I'm drawing the support from you and your responders.
I have recently had bowel surgery. Chemo is just around the corner. My cancer journey has only just began, but since I had surgery, I am supposedly cancer free. However, I realised I will be a cancer patient for the rest of my life, regardless.
Things not being normal seems to be the new normal. In the last few weeks I've been going through so much. Much of the same stuff you and others have been describing. Even writing on this forum at odd hours of the morning.
I guess, if there is something I can add, it is to find a reason to fight. I went through a lot before I discovered what my reason was. It wasn't for myself. It was for the people closest to me. They need me and I am not ready to let them down. I've discovered I have changed considerably. I've grown a lot as a person. It hasn't saved me from the ups and down on the rollercoaster. But it has me focussed on beating cancer.
Stay on the forum. I've drawn a lot of support from it so far. There was a very interesting post I read when I first joined. Someone called out for people who had beaten cancer to post details of their fight. There were so many amazing responses, from people with a wide variety of problems. I found this very reassuring.
All the best with your fight.
I had a better day yesterday but am now awake at ridiculous o'clock because my brain has gone into overdrive. I am still waiting for a call back from the surgeon to get a plan in place. Sounds like you have a good background to draw on to help with the anxiety and all the uncertainty that comes with this diagnosis. It is comforting to have someone else who understands this journey.
Be part of this supportive community