Just been confirmed that I have vulva melanoma

[Donotbeafraid]

I am 46. Just seen specialist on my biopsy result yesterday, it is melanoma with Breslow thickness 2.1mm and dermal mitotic rate 6 per/mm2. I was told it is quite deep and developing fast so will have a large area if not all of my vulva removed. Not sure what stage it is yet as specialist suspects some areas that are not sampled for biopsy which have dark pigmentation are melanoma as well but she wants to let surgeon to look at them.  Still waiting for the surgeon to call me to make appointment, (not sure why I can not call them and when they are going to call, though the specialist told me she would send my file to the surgeon and ask them to speed things up).

I was kind of prepared for this after doing my research online first, I thought I would not be so emotional but still felt so emotional when I was told and still now. My daughter is only 8, sticks to me all the time, I don't know how can she cope with life without me. I think I feel sad for my family and my sister that they might lose me... It's hard to understand why I cry, but I tried to hide my tears when I am with my daughter and pretend to be normal. 

My mum had lymphoma and now I have melanoma.  A nurse at the specialist clinic told me her husband had lymphoma and her daughter has melanoma, so there is a pattern here. She was so kind, she hugged me and let me cried on her shoulders and gave a cup of tea. She told me her daughter had 3 surgeries and is doing fine now. I hope I can get through this as well.

I am referred to Robyn Saw in North Shore Melanoma Institute. Any one who has seen her or have had similar condition like me? Though I know it is a very rare kind of cancer...

Thanks for reading,

[LindaG]

Hi Donotbeafraid, so very sorry for your diagnosis. It’s normal to be emotional with any cancer diagnosis. My anxiety was just awful when I was diagnosed with Lymphoma last year. I hope you are surrounded by family and friends to support you. The Cancer Council are really good to talk to. If you don’t hear from the surgeon soon just ring their office. Usually they are very understanding. Sending you love and prayers 🙏💕. Linda G

[HelenBeee]

Hey just read your post and Im so sorry that this is happening to you. This is an awful time for you and your family and what really ramps up the stress fear and worry is the waiting and living with the unknown whilst you wait. It truly sucks Ive just come through the wait/diagnosis period of the cancer experience 4 months of pure hell.

But there is so much that you can do to improve it and it starts right here seeking support it was the best thing I ever did.

I reached out to the cancer council support services spoke to a support worker and it was a defining moment in me gaining back some control in my out of control life. Your family also have access to support services too. You dont have to go through this alone. Your GP can also be another great support they are there for your mental health as well as the physical so when you feel overwhelmed make an appointment tell them how you are feeling. There is also this forum there is always someone here who  will reply. Youre not alone we all understand the trauma of a cancer diagnosis. Sending you massive hugs and good vibes Helen 🤗🤗