Hi atuck,
I just saw your note, I'd like to know how you are going? I am sorry you got no response with your initial post, I hope you ok.
So much for one (two) to cope with. There is no reason (it seems, god knows I've searched) why these things happen, and why so much to some, but nothing to others. Since my experiences I don't like the concept karma, these things - sometimes really terrible things - happen to people.
Wishing you both support and courage on your journey.