Anal Cancer Newbie

[Terri]

Hi  Heids, I will answer anything I can just remember that mine was in 1997 but as they say, rad. is the gift that keeps on giving !!!!! I would not have been able to go thru any of this without my husband & family. Not sure how blunt you want  me to be but I feel the truth is the best. We have not been able to have intercourse since the rad. treatments. My vagina was burnt so bad that it is too narrow so we pretend we are teens in the back of a  car steaming up the windows, lol.  Oral & direct manipulation works for us as he has had prostate cancer & can no longer "stand at attention" anymore, lol of course we miss intercourse.......back then they didn't even have dilators so that a plus for you. My mornings are the same as you but get better until I try & eat. I kinda live on frozen fruit smoothies & protein drinks. What little I do eat may stay or may not & I never eat out anymore. I was doing pretty good until the hystorectomy which thru me right into the change having hot flashes before I left the hospital. Then I got the shingles on top of where I had the rad burns & that did more nerve damage to the point that I seldom leave the house at all now. The VIN was just the icing on the cake=removing right labia so all i can wear are dresses which i wore alot anyway. Most of my life I have been a back-up singer with 3 different groups & that is what I miss most. I can still sing & do at a studio but I haven't gotten back on stage in 2 years. We do still have jam sessions in our family room. So, this is my life now & I shall not complain. My husband bought us a large house on a lake 10 years ago so since I have to be home I couldn't have asked for more. I hope I have answered most of your questions & just know I will always try to tell you the truth. You are in my prayer's & please stay in touch. Hugs, Terri

[Heidsta]

Oh Terri!😢 I relate to SO much of what you've shared here. Thank you for being so candid.

I somewhat understand how narrow that tissue would be without dilators. We had to spend two weeks in Sydney in May moving my mum into full-time care & I stupidly forgot to take my dilator pack. So after only just two weeks without them, 5 months post treatment, I had to restart the process down a size & it was VERY slow going. I can only begin to imagine what the last 23 or so years has been for you in this regard. It's SO, SO beautiful you & your husband have worked out a new level of intimacy instead of giving up all together. He sounds like a wonderful, compassionate support for you.

Yes, smoothies are my new afternoon tea! My colorectal surgeon explained that I'm someone who needs pith so my smoothie is orange & pineapple with a little mango & blueberries just for flavour, then a hint of vanilla yoghurt to polish it off. After the chemoradio I can no longer tolerate it for breakfast (instead I have one Weetbix with some Psyllium Husk - which is my new best friend - & homemade granola). So far it's working brilliantly. I just wish I'd known all this 30years ago! I had absolutely no idea my normal was not how it had to be. For the last 25 odd years my GP's have asked how my bowels have been, & I'd always answered 'normal' because they were MY normal. I now wish they would've rephrased that question to be "EXPLAIN your bowels for me"! Anyway, I'm extremely thankful to have that all sorted now.

My radiotherapy treatment has brought on menopause. Initially I had occasional hot flushes throughout each day & night, but they seem to have petered off a little which is great.

Those shingles sound like a real bugger. What a shame it had such a drastic effect on your already damaged nerves... the absolute last thing you needed.

I'm a singer too Terri!!! The year you had your treatment my hubby (guitarist) & I were getting ready to attend Los Angeles Music Academy! I never did anything grand really - not that I really wanted to anyway - but what I did, I enjoyed. Your home sounds stunning, & a beautifully serene place to carry out your existence.

We actually spend most of our year housesitting (not so much since COVID hit), but otherwise are based at the beach on the NSW north coast. It's been a beautiful, peaceful part of the world to be recovering so I am also extremely thankful & can relate a little to tranquility of your lake setting too. We are both blessed to experience such peace.

Thanks so much for your prayers Terri, & ditto for you both too.

Much love to you, and thanks so much.

Big hugs back!

Heids

xo

[Terri]

Heids,

    You asked how old i was for the first surgery, I was 41 & am now 68. We sure have alot in common between loving the water & singing & now cancer !!!!! I am so happy that you can travel without many problems. I used to go to FL. 2months a year but the shingles put an end to that too but I do love the beach. I never had any grand ideas about singing either, just really enjoyed it. I did travel alittle when I sang with a Country/Rock band in the 70's then started singing in a duet ( Rhonda, she became my best friend& has been with us for all my surgeries) in 1990 Southern Grace, we do all kinds of music, then Recorded with Glory Road for 6 years. We always joke that we are "Legends in our own minds" lol.

    Really glad we met on here as I will always be here for you or anyone else I can help beings I am old as dirt now !  Hugs & stay in touch, xoxoxo

Terri

[Heidsta]

Good morning HeyJude,

Just checking in to see how you're going this week. How are you feeling?

I also have some encouraging news to share with you... My doc called late yesterday to say my biopsy I had back on June 23rd was all clear! Thank God! Such a HUGE relief. So for the next few years he & my radiological oncologist will tag team checkups every 6months with a few CT scans thrown in as well, then yearly thereafter up until 5yrs. If all the results are clear, that's when they'll declare me to be cancer free... Here's hoping & praying.

Nice to be able to share some happy news with you.

Stay safe, & look after yourself.

Heids

😊

[Heidsta]

Good morning Terri,

Well it sounds like you had a lot of fun singing your heart out. Good for you. It's a lot more than many people would ever hope to experience.

I have some encouraging news to share with you... My doc called late yesterday to say my biopsy I had back on June 23rd was all clear! Thank God! Such a HUGE relief. So for the next few years he & my radiological oncologist will tag team checkups every 6months with a few CT scans thrown in as well, then yearly thereafter up until 5yrs. If all the results are clear, that's when they'll declare me to be cancer free... Here's hoping & praying. I'm sure you can well relate to all of that.

Nice to be able to share some happy news with you.
Stay safe, & look after yourself.
Heids

😊

[Heidsta]

PS. Love your profile pic!😉

[Terri]

Hey Heids,

 That is such great news & so happy for you.  Not all   things with cancer are bad.......if not for the cancer I never would have started going to FL. which is where I met Lee & Kim Greenwood as they were in the same row of condos & we became fast friends. We took a trip with him to OK in 1999. I have always loved his music & during that weekend he told me about how he wrote God Bless the USA.  I have gone to 5 of his shows & always get  a hug & kiss & a how ya doin..... ( to this day he thinks I don't own any shoes)  So ya gotta look for the humor in all of this. You sound like such a positive person that I have tons of prayers for you & sure enjoy hearing from you so take care & keep in touch,   

Hugs, Terri xoxoxo

[Terri]

Heids, that is our wedding picture !!!!!!! we got married at Judge Roy Beans Old Tyme Photo in Eurika Springs, AR, in 2003. We lived together for 20 years before we got married just to make sure it was gonna work so we weren't even married when I had the 1st. cancer........... He is my rock😍

[Heidsta]

Thanks so much Terri. I'm SO happy to be able to share my news with you.

You're so right, there's many positives & even blessings to be found in a cancer journey. That may sound odd to some, but you really do have to see the positives above all the negative. I don't believe in coincidence... Everything happens for a reason, even a cancer diagnosis, & all along our journey there's been others who've needed a smile or a hug (pre COVID) or a listening ear to help them through too. That makes it all the more worthwhile. And yes, I am a very positive person with a deep faith, a super supportive & loving family & a few very special friends who've helped me in so many, many ways. I have SO much to be thankful for.

Cute story re: your wedding pic. Isn't it just SO wonderful to have a loving, supportive husband. And lovely to know the Greenwood's too.

Take care & keep safe.

Will definitely keep in touch.

Heids

😊

[Heidsta]

Hello Terri,

I hope you're both going well.

Wishing you a Happy New Year... I think I can possibly speak for both of us that we're just happy to still be here to see in another new year!

How are you traveling?

I'm thankful to be doing pretty well. I think my biggest source of frustration is my mushy brain I'm putting down to the chemo!?!?!?! I used to be a personal assistant so am normally very organised, but these days I can't even manage to bring home everything on my shopping list that is in my hand! My 'front internals' aren't real good either but I have a scheduled 1yr appointment with my gyno In a few weeks so I'm hoping we can address some things. It was good to see my Colorectal Surgeon in early December for a checkup & to  get a good report as well as to hear him say "it's only been a year!". It made me think I may have had higher expectations for myself than was plausible?! All in all I'm extremely thankful for our progress though considering the mess I was in this time last year.

Sending Loadza luv & hugs, & wishing you well for the year ahead.

Heids

❤️