I'm new here and need to talk with somebody

EmmaStone
New Contributor

I'm new here and need to talk with somebody

Hello everyone! I want to share with you my story from getting diagnosed to living with skin cancer. My name is Emma Stone. Mom of a boy Bobby and a beautiful girl Samantha. I was diagnosed with skin cancer in the beginning of 2022. It’s very hard to describe my emotions and loved ones when I was diagnosed… especially kid's emotions... Of course we didn’t know any clinics, we would never have thought that this was waiting for one of us. We started reading a lots of articles about cancer and I was sure I'll get diagnosed. Of course I try not to talk about cancer not to cause even more pain to my family but I know how much they care about me and maybe it's a big mistake to hide my emotions. In june of 2022 I started my treatment via them (not sure is it important) which is still going on. It’s hard to say how I’m feeling now but I feel lonely all the time… I hope I’ll find a bit of support here I just want to share my emotions and just to talk. My friend Linda advised me Cancer Council (her uncle is sitting here also (Hey Jim if you're reading this)) and after a few days here I found similar people with similar problems so I feel now not so alone how I was before. I know how imagination works and I understand how loved ones can think about things worse than they really are but I'm still afraid to make them constantly think about it. But the feeling of expecting something bad does not leave me. Autumn is my favourite season and I’m fighting to see it again! How do you share your emotions with your family and do you even share with somebody?? Big hugs to the community here💕 Emma

3 REPLIES 3
Bob63
Occasional Contributor

Re: I'm new here and need to talk with somebody

Hi Emma

My wife Eileen was diagnoses with colon cancer in October 2017. Her treatment started the next week. Everybody took the news differently, some refused to believe it and others jumped in and wanted to know what they could do to help. The most helpful people were our daughter and Eileen’s mom. My mom also offered to help, but we told her we were ok, my mom had her own health problems to deal with, and in the beginning I could take care of everything. Eileen came up with a rule for holiday dinners; no one was allowed to talk about cancer. She wanted to have a nice day and talking about cancer was not a nice subject, and no not everyone would follow the rule.

Our daughter saw a psychologist for a while to give her some one to voice her complaints too, besides me. I thought about seeing one myself but decided there was nothing they could say that would make it go away. Although Eileen’s mom was very helpful she was sure we were doing everything wrong, we weren’t taking any of her advice on certain fruits and vegetable drinks that other people claimed cured them.

I had told Eileen several times over the years to just do what she thought was best, because she is the one with cancer not us. If she wanted to talk about cancer we would and if she didn't we did not. She and myself took each holiday, birthday, and anniversary as it was her last.

Although Eileen was one of those people who did not like doctors she did mostly everything they told her to do.

Her original diagnoses was inoperable stage four colon cancer and the doctor told her that with treatment maybe two years. She passed away after four years and eight months, still not enough time.

I too came to this site looking for help, and found some really nice people here.

Take care Emma

LindaG
Frequent Contributor

Re: I'm new here and need to talk with somebody

Hi Emma. I’m a year out from cancer treatment and it was successful for me. I had lots of support from my close family and some friends. Some people were totally unexpected support during my time of need. I’ve never been good at hiding my feelings so it was ok for me to be real with those closest to me. It just helped to have those I could cry with if I needed to. That also included the amazing medical team looking after me. So empathetic and honest. We all are so different in how we deal with our cancer diagnosis. I wonder what treatment you are having? You’ll know who you can trust with your feelings. We’ll always try and support you here. 🙏💕 Linda G

EmmaStone
New Contributor

Re: I'm new here and need to talk with somebody

Thanks for warm welcome everybody! I feel your stories too... I will also support everybody here and I'm sure everything will be fine at us!

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