Well I didn’t see that coming!

[Feebs74]

Hi everyone.  I’m Feebs, and I found out I had stage 4 bowel cancer in Jan 2025.
One minute I was living an active lifestyle with no symptoms, until I found a lump in my abdomen which, well, brings me here. 😞

Since then I have had bowel resection surgery and a radical hysterectomy.  I also had a bunch of affected lymph nodes removed.

My gyno and colorectal specialists say they have done all they can for me surgically, (Which I am grateful for),  and I am now undergoing chemo.
I had my fourth treatment today.  
What I am struggling with the most is the not knowing.  Not having a prognosis.  I try to remain as positive as I can, but I am a practical person, and stats are not looking to be in my favour. 

I have been referred to a psychologist, but can’t get an appointment until the end of May!

I am constantly crying.  

I fear I am wasting what precious time I have left.
I can’t plan anything.

I don’t know what I need financially. 
Does anyone else feel this helplessness?

[Felicity_CCNSW]

Hi @Feebs74 

I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis and for it all to happen so suddenly. It is such a terrible shock to receive a diagnosis and navigate surgery and treatment so quickly. 

When you call our Cancer Council Information and Support Line on 13 11 20  you come through to one of our health professionals who are oncology nurses or social workers. They are very informed, incredibly supportive and a wealth of information for support services within Cancer Council and the wider community. I really encourage you to give them a call and see what further support might be available to you. 

It is great that you reached out to this forum. Perhaps others could share their experience of navigating support after their diagnosis. 

Take care,

Felicity

Cancer Council Online Moderator 

[Richard1]

Hi Feebs. The feelings you are going through are a natural reaction to the chaos of the unknown. Their is no right or wrong way to get to the other side. Have faith in your medical and cancer care team. I got stage 2 bowel cancer back in mid Dec 24. I know the feeling of life crashing around you. For me I sucked it up, after the tears of coarse, and got back to living. Best advise I can give, baby steps. Wake up early and try to be productive, it sucks and is painful but life will go on around you regardless. It took me 3 months to start feeling normal again because I didn’t give up, I wanted so badly to quit my job, stay in bed and cry. But now I feel strong because I don’t let it break me. Their is light at the end of the tunnel, don’t give up, never give up, give cancer the middle finger and go about your day and once you get through this you will be unbreakable.💪💪💪❤️❤️❤️ 

[Feebs74]

Thanks Felicity 

I was able to speak with a counsellor arranged by Cancer Council yesterday, which was great.

Many thanks for the quick response and service. 

[Feebs74]

Hi Richard

Thanks for reaching out. 
It certainly is a roller coaster and I don’t deal that well with chaos.  But I am learning that “it is what it is” and I try to make the most of every day, trying to find pleasure in the small things.  Some days are just harder than others. 

 I don’t sleep much, so I’m up before dawn and walk my dog to a nearby lookout for sunrise. 

Hopefully I’ll be around to see as few  more. 🤞

[Richard1]

Living with cancer sucks, no other way to put it. I might have 5 years left. How do you process that. Before my surgery the Doc said I had months left. Makes me feel sick, depressed, lost. Everything I’ve done and do now seems pointless. I guess todays a down day for me, feel so tired. You know how it goes, good days bad days. Venting makes life a bit easier. Sorry to be so negative, hope your doing better than me Feebs.

[Feebs74]

Oh Richard 💔

We all need to be able to vent now and again.  Just don’t let the anger be all that we have. 🙏
Not knowing what the future holds or how much time remains is one of the hardest things to deal with, so all I can do is embrace each day as best I can.  
I’m heading out to watch the sun come up now and look for little things to brighten my day.

Hope you can find some too. xx