Hey Usekh,
So sorry to hear of your lousy start to new year. I know how you feel, I was the same, yay welcome in 2012 with a radical neck dissection then lose some teeth, now waiting my ultimate destiny with the radiotherapy machine. yippeee cant wait, NOT.
I know its hard, your only so young, wow 37, Im 48 this year and I think Im too young for this crap. I cant help you with chemo, not my case thank goodness, I think the radio is going to be bad enough, sheesh they wont leave me alone....Im out of my op 4 wks today and they already have me going in next week for my planning etc, mask blah blah.
I dont blame you being scared, and its good to have a cry, I must admit Ive had my few tears, but I think it helps. You hang in there ok? And this site is awesome, with so many awesome people dealing with their own demons, and everyone here is here for you, keep talking if you cant talk to your networks yet. I know I understand your pain.
Hugs
Leesa