HER 2 positive breast cancer stage 3

[Belinda56]

Hi there I’m just finishing 14 cycles of clinical trial chemo  each 3 weeks apart after  doing 6 cycles of initial chemo. I also have had a double mastectomy and lymph nodes taken from arm.  I feel ok but was hoping my oncologist might say I was done and I would somehow continue my life but she’s offering me chemo tablets for two years on another trial and somehow it’s made me so upset as I think that this is now my life. Trial after trial and no escaping this cloud of doom which is cancer thoughts continually filling my head and I’m wondering if I’m lucky to have this opportunity or do I pass and good for the best. I’m also on anastrozole for the next 5 years. Isn’t that enough.? 
anyone else with my type of cancer ? 

[HelenBeee]

Hi Belinda56
Im so sorry that you having a difficult time with your treatment I feel like you need to have a talk with your Oncologist about how you are feeling and ask her what outcomes she is expecting to achieve in terms of undertaking the trial. It would be good to get her exact reasons for having you do this trial. The next thing to ask is what it entails and what happens after the 2 years. If you feel you cant talk to her make an appt with the clinical nurse and talk to them I find they are very good sources of information about your treatment and have direct contact with the Drs and will advocate for you if necessary. You have done amazing so far 14 cycles that shows real strength and resilience. We know with cancer its one mountain to climb at a time. I understand exactly how you feel when I have my down days I feel like I will always live in its shadow and I mourn the person I was before I got the call that changed my life so suddenly. Those of us with it know that no matter what anyone says its a nightmare you wouldnt wish on your worst enemy. But there it is. Get those answers from your Oncologist talk about it with your support and make your decision . Sending you a big hug and best wishes and I hope you feel better soon. xxxx

[Belinda56]

Thanks for your message Helen Beee .  People tell me I am lucky to have these opportunities for more clinical trials but I suppose we all feel differently.  I will talk to my oncologist. She’s very good , but I was just a bit blown away when she brought up this next trial as I was feeling positive and uplifted that I only had two more cycles to go.    I suppose it’s keeping me safe ( I hope ) and because HER 2 pos has a greater chance of recurrence I should find out as much as I can and then make a decision.    Cancer sucks !!! 
hope you’re ok ?  Thank you 

[HelenBeee]

As we know noone is "lucky" anything when you have cancer either way good or bad  its traumatic so dont feel like you have to behave lucky being offered trials if thats not the way you feel. Cancer sucks big time regardless. I feel for you one of the worse things about it is what I call the no guarantee policy that comes with it. You go through one traumatic treatment and there seems to always be something else I have endometrial cancer and about to have my surgery and then I have to wait for pathology to know if I too will have to have chemo/radiation or both. It will be 3 months by the time I actually know how they plan on treating my cancer and as you know it hijacks your life and is all consuming. At this point Ive got the surgery mountain to get over and have no idea what Im going to face on the other side. I totally get what  is making you sad and anxious. On the bad days you just want to run away from it all. Im glad your Onc is nice it helps a lot. Im having a good day today and making the most of it thanks for asking.  Do you have a support person? I hope so I really hope that tomorrow is a better day for you. 🤗 Helen

[Belinda56]

Hi Helen. Good luck with your surgery , I’m sure you’ll be well looked after and pathology will result in positive treatment .  Going thru the chemo etc wasn’t the worst experience.  I tried to stay positive and on the whole I was. I have great family and friends and I exercised a lot.  I wore a cold cap which saved a lot of my hair and after a few months Off I did resume some work . All the best to you Helen . I  wish you a speedy recovery .  You’ll be ok 🤗🤗