Brilliant Sailor. Who'd have thought that limbo was such a great place? Good luck Harker.I really don't think that parliament is ready for you! The anaesthesist for my surgeon who does all of his colonoscopies on alternate Wednesdays, always has a quip about it being "that" day in the surgical cycle. I guess if all you see are bums for the whole day, you are permiited a slight joke at the patient's expense! S ... View more

Hi Jill, From what you have shown us I feel that your strength will help you and your boys out the other side. Nothing will ever be the same - that is the reality but I guess it is what we do with it, that counts. As a survivor, I feel privileged that you allowed us into your lives at this time and I hope that at times, we were able to help you through some of the worst times. Cyber friends can never replace the 'real" ones, however, but sometimes I think they understand a little more. I have lost too many "real" and "cyber" friends to this disease in the past 5 years to ever think that there is any rhyme or reason to it.All I know is, that being able to write here with people who understand the anguish has helped me and I hope that occasionally we may have helped you and your boys. Please take care and pop in from time to time and let us know how you are faring. Take care of yourselves, Samex ... View more

Hi all, This is the ever present problem, even if the logical side of your brain is telling you that all is well. AND NO-ONE ELSE GETS IT! Like you Willow, I seem to have to face many of these days on my own as I don't wish to worry my elderly parents and my own family generally forget to ask about results. I recall about 6 months out of treatment when I was still having 3 monthly checks. My GP rang to say that he wanted to redo my liver function test. I was at work and just fell apart. Fortunatley I had lovely colleagues around me who jumped into the breach with tea and hugs. The results were fine, he was just being over cautious. I have a trip to China coming up in September (taking 16 school kids, so no holiday) and is just when I need scans, colonoscopies etc. I spent days pondering which way to go(have them before or after) but my GP chatted with me and I decided to wait. It will be 3 years from diagnosis and 3 weeks won't make any difference. This is what so many don't understand - it just never goes away and impacts on so many other things in our lives. I really hope that you are feeling better and I often try to relive my holiday in NYC last year when things become a little bleak. Take care all, S ... View more

As a survivor, it wrenches me to hear of what Jill and Jewel are experiencing. It particularly pains me that they have young children to try to explain this hideous situation to. For those of us who have been granted the gift of survival, we must make every minut count. My heart goes out to you both. I desperately hope that there is some peace for you both and your families. Hugs, S ... View more

Oh Cats, WHile my situation is so much different to yours, I think we all have that same reality to some extent. I remember saying in the Staffroom at school about a year before I was diagnosed that i would feel really ripped off if I were to die young as there was so much to do. At that stage I felt I had all the time in the world as my parents were in the 80s and in relatively good health and my grandmother lived until 92. Now ,I would also love to have 15 years as I retire in 2 years and would love some of that retirement time(paid a huge amount in Super for the past 30 odd years!). However, I also think that I would be content with 6 years to see my youngest son graduate from uni. We have reached one 21st this week but I would love another 5 to see the next. Grandchildren I don't know about! Anyway, I guess the point is that we strive for the goal and cherish what milestones we are allowed to enjoy. You're right - miracles do happen - all the time. Sailor, I do love that song that you quote. May we all be safe. S ... View more

Alana - like mother like daughter methinks! Is BJ the one with all of the classic oneliners? If she is, I reckon she could do a one-woman show and raise thousands. I'm off to google Pab's Place - what an inspiration you are. Samex ... View more

Hi Mazza, I'm glad your daughter is going with you. I faced the first few hours on my own and then my ever faithful mum and dad joined me and made sure that I was safely home where my then 18 year old asked if he could have a bbq with some friends that night. No idea!. I guess all that can be said is ask for all the information that you can and don't be too despondent when your body does things that you don't expect. Your experience will be different to anybody elses's. Give yourself goals to see yourself through it all. Mine was a facial at the half way point! remeber to let go here if you need to. Always someone to listen. Take care, S ... View more

Hi Ross, Glad to see you enjoying work so much. I think that worrying is part of the deal that has been handed to us. I have had awful trouble with it but I am getting better. I try to only worry about what I can have an effect on these days and I am really working hard at not taking on everyone elses's burdens. Hard with a family and being a teacher. You've inspired me to get up and have a walk tomorrow as well. Managed both yesterday and today, so 3 days in a row will be great. Good luck with it all, Samex ... View more

hi Alana, Glad to hear the positive tone. What was the fundraiser? You are an amazing ball of energy!! S ... View more

Hi all, I woke up (as usual) the other night/morning at about 2.30am with the hands tingling as ususal. This usually happens about 2-3 times a night. I then rolled over on my sore shoulder an had to find another position and thought "will these irritating pains ever go away?' Maybe it is a function of age as well but the constancy of it is driving me crazy! i know that I am whining when others' circumstances are so much worse, but these constant annoyances are just reminders of what was and what could be again. it doesn't help the "moving forward" process at all. Frangipani- after 2 years from treatment, my feet are much better. My toes still go numb at times(often after exercise) but the intense pain has eased. My hands are bad at night but generally Ok during the day. My fine motor control is certainly not what it was but I don't drop as many things as I used to. I guess one way of managing it all is that I often say that at least i am here to feel the pain. Take care all, S ... View more