About frangipani

frangipani

at this stage in your life its not about "closeness" its about feeling loved. please don't feel guilty about your partner. life now is about YOU. wake up each morning feeling grateful. love yourself.

frangipani

hellow survivors I was reading thru some of the blogs and just burst out crying. It seems so long since the big change happened in my life. being on CANCER CONNECTIONS helps so much confirming we not alone. So much in the news recently about celebs having a double masectomy etc etc. I have learnt so much about life in general. I have matured in many ways but there is one big thing. As much as I pretend that i am normal i am not. when i finally finish my day and i put my head down on my pillow its like HEY! you can step out of it now and just let it all melt down.... Its been a long time since i was on CC I turned 61 -- became a grandma 3 years ago when i got diagnosed -- suffered with the reconstruction on both breasts. They are still like 2 bricks and still find difficulty sleeping on my side at night. My toes still hurt they are still numb and my toe nails are still going black and the complete nail just drops off. fortunately there is a new little one ready to see the world. Ye you gotta laugh.... Recently, i am getting a cough that sounds like whooping cough. had a blood test that confirmed that it was,nt but who knows each year there are so many new ones. Last week i had a flu vaccine which made me very sick but after 2 days i feel better. A new thing which is happening is my blood pressure is excalating!! I regularly was a 120/80 now it hovers over 140/99 after 3 attempts will have to see my GP and go on tabs. Maybe its the 100 day cough that is causing this. I hate to say it but YES chemo brain is still going to stay. I have retired from work, given it all up but to keep sane i do a lot of gardening, am currently working on a 3000 piece jigsaw puzzle and travelling as much as i can with my grand daughter. my beautiful Sofija will turn 4 this year which means i am still on remission and my oncologist still reminds me that i do have cancer!! My dear husband of 39 years? i look at him each day and wonder how much longer will he remain in our marriage.... as i said i am just pretending, the real me does not want to be in this marriage as its too hurtful for me to see him suffer this journey together. As i say there is a reason for everything and being a Hindu i was thought that cancer is our final journey, we have already gone through our several lives and finaly we will arrive "home"

frangipani

My thoughts are with you. I was so sorry to hear this and being a survivor myself - I feel helpless. we dont know what tomorrow brings, but you have it in front of you - literally. Be brave my sister and may God bless you and your family and the family next door. A real tragic!!

frangipani

Allicat, y I had my final reconstuction on the 11/05/2011 and am home after just 2 days in hospital. It was not painful at all. what my PS did was remove the tissue expander and insert the selicone or gel. the stiches are neat (done on the same cut as the mastectomy). the drains are still in. In fact I went into his surgery today to have them removed but he said that they are not stopping - so i should come back on thursday. these dont hurt when he cuts them. You too will be on your way to recovery. Please do the exercises for that arm as it helps with the circulation. I look into google for any help. Be brave, think positive and remember its the end of the road now......

frangipani

The word "chemo" sounds frightening. we did it - and hopefully we dont have to worry about it again!!! Let this be positive. its a new journey now and we were the chosen ones. A new crop of hair is great. Mine has grown back think and curly, just like i always wanted it. It has been two years since i was diagnosed. It wasnt plain sailing all the time - but most times i even could'nt believe how i completed what i had to do. I found the energy and most of all I believed in myself and my team of doctors. Today, after 2 previous mast I have just completed my reconstuction and feel on top of the world. In fact I feel in alignment and can jump for joy. Take each stage as it comes and you too will not believe what you can achieve. You are beautiful in every way - when you get your strength (and you will) scream for joy, laugh, run on the beach and jump as high as you can. Life is beautiful. Frangipani.

frangipani

Alli * wonderful news. looks like you are on your way to recovery.It sounds like you are positive and dont worry about the nipples. You are alive and it doesnt matter. you can always put in an artificial one or even have one tattooed! Trust me you will be fine. regarding the drains. at the beginning I felt terrible about them. Then I started saying to myself that they were mine and the inside of my body was crying for the sudden loss. Each day it became less and more clear until finally my PC just pulled it out and put a bandage over it. NO. DEFINATELY NO HOLE but a tiny scar which depending on your skin, mine is disappearing after 2 months. I hope i am giving you some relief. I am only telling you honestly how and what i am going thru. I wish you all the best. Oh, and one more thing. Try meditation if you hav'nt already.....its great. frangipani.

frangipani

Alli I am so happy that you responded and that I may be able to bring you some relief to this operation. Congrats on you finishing chemo. will you be on any other drugs like herceptin? Yes. You will have the tissue expanders inserted as the skin over the breast will have to be large enough for the silicone to be placed. The idea is to fill the expanders with a saline solution - its like a balloon and when large enough a cut will be done on the same scar and the silicone placed. Remember there will be no nipples. How bizaar!!! I am still getting used to this....... Regarding the drains? Yes, I came home with 4 drains - two on either side. I stayed in hospital for 5 days and after the 2nd day got used to the new look AND PAIN. Please dont hesitate to take a prescription for a strong pain killer. You will need it. But let the flow of pain go thru your body. It will end trust me. Dont fight it and take lots of bed rest too. I hope you have others to take care of you and DONT CARRY ANYTHING HEAVY. it hurts. Also keep away from anybody who has the flu or coughs. If you get sick it will hurt in your chest. Oh and regarding the tissue expanders again.... yes, there is a port on either side of your breasts. Your PC will put a magnate and this will show him exactly where to fill the saline solutions. Hope I have helped. As you mentioned you might not need expanders - you lucky gal! Remember, nose up and you will be back to normal soon. I have another 150 mls on each side and it will be over. well not yet as I have to go thru the final op of opening the scar and inserting the silicone. I think i will be back home with the drains. they need to be measured twice a day and emptyed twice a day too. What fun! Best regards, Frangipani.

frangipani

My third session with the Plastic Surgeon today. He has now injected 900ml of saline. I originally had large breasts and my frame is comfortable with this large size - so here I am. No pain just ready for the next step. They will tell me when to be admitted again and the tissue expanders removed and selicone inserted. My PC said that the opening will be in the original cut. Will let you know in a few weeks how I feel. I am now mentally totally relaxed and positive leaving behind all the hard painful days. If anybody out there wants to know about reconstruction after mastectomy, please dont hesitate with questions. May the force be with you. Frangipani

frangipani

Reconstruction: This is an update. It has now been 8 weeks since my left breast was removed (the right breast was removed 12 mths prior) The reconstruction was started immediately. 2 tissue expanders inserted and I have already had 2 sessions of saline injections. It is remarkable how my breasts have expanded and if you think of a pregnant woman and how the skin remarkably streches over the stomach, this is exactly what happens to the breasts as saline is inserted over a period of time * usually 2 weeks. At first it was painful and even now I cant sleep on my side but now I am used to the feeling and it is almost painless. I think I will need only two more sessions of saline injections. The tissue expanders are like baloons inserted into both my breasts. My new breasts now feel firm and i must admit it feels better than my "old breasts" In a few weeks I will be admitted again and under surgery the tissue expanders removed and gel selicone inserted. what magic has come out of this nightmare!!! I want to say that i highly recommend anybody who has a breast removed to consider a discussion with your surgeon and have the other breast removed and reconstruct straightaway. Its the best thing i have ever done. I now feel normal and confident with myself. All the best. frangipani

frangipani

Its over a year now since I was diagnosed and after chemo my hair grew straight and grey. I had it coloured and even got foils. Now I have a fringe and the whole head is so curly. I dont know what to do. I have it straightened after a shampoo using the hair dryer but the heat seems to have made it more curly after the next wash. I am so frustrated that am at a stage to just ignore and live with what i have. frangipani.

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