Hi TJ, Yep society can handle normal people but when you look different or talk differently it can be bloody hard. After a number of surgeries I ended up looking lots different to what I was and had difficulty talking, eating, etc, etc. Now I walk down the street and you can see people looking at you. People can be impatient as well when you are trying to say something. They don't like taking the time to listen It has certainly made me more aware of other people with disabilities and more compassionate. ... View more

Hey Sarah, that is a great analysis of the happens to us because we got sick. I have been at this for 4 years now and boy have I learned about people who I called friends and even family. I also struggle with that kind of loneliness but the anti depressants have helped. ... View more

Hi Daphne, Lonely It is very hard when you are doing this yourself. I found that I was continually chasing people then I kinda stopped doing that as I just felt that the effort was not worthwhile. My disabilities are quite apparent but you know I still go out and have a coffee by myself or one of the very few people that are still around. Geess sometimes I think I have the plague or there is something wrong with my character. Anyway I have found meditation really helpful. PeterMac run meditation sessions on Monday and Thursday and they are really good. I have also started on antidepressants and sleep long periods and my body has a chance to recover. In Buddhism they say you must suffer before you realise the path you must travel and I am a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. With great compassion Carl ... View more

Hey I think this is a real problem, after battling this disease for over 3 years I find that the number of friends I have can be counted on one hand. I have recently just lost the one person that had stuck with right throughout. I think initially people do not know what to say or how they can help and the best way in dealing with it is to ignore it. I also feel that the crap that our carers go through takes its toll and they just get burnt out. I totally understand but sometimes I get angry about the toll it takes here and the fact that you basically end up alone. Not sure really whether the effort was worth it. ... View more

HI Karen, Yes I am the same person who worked with you on the projects. We are an illustrious little group. I have been seeing consultants and RMH and they are going to rebuild my bottom lip and bottom gums. Place teeth implants into my lower jaw. They do not recommend hyperbaric treatment as my reconstructed lower jaw seems to be quite healthy. Besides there is a question mark about Hyperbaric as it can encourage cancer cells to grow. One real positive about this next phase is that I will have a gutter for saliva. There is a risk that necrosis may occur - gees if that happened I would not know what to do. I guess we are in that high risk group. 3 strikes and you.....That is the reality. ... View more

Hi Guys, Thanks for all your responses. When I see the psychologist and psychiatrist, I think that in some ways the isolation is such a big issue. Because I had part of my tongue replaced it makes it difficult to talk. You know what you want to say but you slow all your muscles down to what you are capable of. It is difficult to socialize. When I had my treatment friends and family were sometimes there but I used to recall getting to each radiotherapy by myself. I felt abandoned. How do you deal with that? ... View more

Hi All, I have been reading all your comments and find them so comforting. When I originally posted I was talking I think about antidepressants. Well I am going to go on them. I am sick of my mood swings and the lethargy. I know a lot of is caused my the drugs that are shoved into your body. I just cannot deal with it anymore and I am coming up for some more ops on my face to make me look more beautiful and to also stop the saliva dribbling down my face, etc. It is so hard for others to understand the feelings you have after having gone through chemo, radio and the other operations. (I had tonsil cancer). Cheers Carl ... View more

Hi All, It really is comforting to see all this as I am through chemo, radio and a number of ops for throat cancer. I have a really hard time getting any sort of activity going. I hate my life. I am seeing a psych and my GP. Both have agreed that anti depressants would help. I was a bit reluctant at first but I cannot function like I am. I am so emotional, think that no-one cares and I hate looking at myself. ... View more