Thank you AJ and Wombat.it was like a nightmare that i just couldn't wake up from. I am glad i was there for her till the end. i just heard from my dad he seems to be ok when i spoke to him on the phone. I know she is looking down on us. I create candles and her favourite colour is purple and at her funeral i dedicated a purple candle to her and had it burning while the funeral was happening. When its her birthday, anniversary, the day she passed i will burn her candle in memory of her. I still see her face as she was passing i think that will be with me for a while. Right now im only just coping as hubby has just flown back to work today and am feeling a little lonely im constantly feeling nauseated and am having a hard time sleeping at night but yet for some strange reason im having a nap for about 2 hours during the day when i never could sleep at daytime. its very strange. thank you wombat for the name of the solace in the net i will have a look for it when i get a chance. ... View more