I'm sorry it's taken so long for me to respond, and I'm sorry you have lost your son.
My mother has lost 3 children through another illness that the gene runs through the family(I escaped it, and it has been shocking for her over the years fearing, then watching and the dying.
But she plods along.She lost my father the same way so many tears ago.
community things, still does meals on wheels at 83 and still puts us into place.
She has told me that a day never goes by without thinking of them all,but you have to keep going.
For my part, I have watched mum over the years and all I can put it down to is she inherited the strength(toughness)from her dad.
With me, its been tough watching and loosing all these people, but nothing compared to loosing my man.I actually had a medium talk to me recently, and I know not all are for this, or believe, and I have always been sceptical, but when it hits close, it's amazing how it can affect. My man came through strong, and told me outright through the medium what I needed to know with an issue that,s popped up.
It helped me lots, but the risk in this is not being able to let go. I have a choice of letting go with no communication, or getting what I can as I need, and continuing on as I have been.It's tough.The medium told me we were together in a past life, which is why our connection is so strong.
I hope you have other children, because it is those that helps my mother, in particular my young brother, who was her driving force in early days to keep going. 🙂
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Thank you Maddie. I agree time heals.I am doing better now than a month ago.It's 3 months today!And you do have to move on, other wise you can be left behind by friends and family.It is very difficult for me to imagine the future without him because he was it! I was married for a lot of years to some one else , then divorced.
When my man did finally come along, he was without a doubt the one I was intended for. He gave me the love I had been craving for, so now I have to adjust to that not being here.
I am starting to venture out a little, and I'm starting to think holiday too, so that must be some where on the way.
It sounds like you went through a rough period. It's good you are going so well now.
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I don't know about you guys, but I still have days when it's still a shock to realize that not only is he not here now, but worse, he's never going to be here again.
I have had a photo enlarged which has him looking totally relaxed (though sick) laying across the bed showing the camera, the book he had just received for his birthday (from me)"This is your life" full of photo's from when he was born right up till this photo was taken.
It is this photo that encourages me to keep going.
I look at it, and talk to it as often as I feel inclined, and imagine that the words "This is your life" are for me too.
While anything we might do, might seem strange to others, we have to do what we have to, to help ourselves through this.
And PA,I'm sure you will be fine as a single parent, because as you say, you have no choice, and also, you know that your children need you now more than ever, and as you help them, you'll help yourself....and yes it is one day at a time!
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Yes I lost my partner 13 weeks tomorrow.He lived 10 months after being diagnosed with lung cancer.
It really does hit home. It was at two and a half months that I started to cry less, and able to laugh, but I still think of him most of my waking minutes, and yes it hurts like hell.
I often feel like I will never live normally again, but like you, I am proud of myself.I get up and go to work 5 days a week, and I have started putting a lot of that energy into doing changes into the backyard.finishing what he started, which I think were his intentions.I look at earlier photo's and feel sad, very sad that those days are gone, never to be repeated, but then I look at more recent photo's, and they inspire me to keep going, as he'd have wanted me to do.
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Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.