My Husband was diagnosed with Bowel Cancer 7 weeks ago. He has just started his 4th week of Chemo & Radiation. We had a scare on the weekend, his temperature went up & I had to take him to hospital. They did so many blood tests & x rays & ran 4 bags of antibiotics into him. They couldn't find where the infection was but his temperature did come down. After being there for 22 hours they finally said he could come home but now I'm watching him like a hawk, even more than before. The side effects only started last week which was upsetting for me but after the scare on the weekend I just feel like I'm really loosing it now & it scares me that he's only half way through the first lot of treatment, he still has surgery followed by months more of Chemo. If I already feel like I'm going crazy, how am I going to be able to handle what he still has to come, I don't know how I'm going to do it, I know I will because I just have to but I just don't know how. This man has been my whole life since I was 15, its been 29 years now & I have always fixed everything, I have always made everything alright but this is so out of my hands, I cant fix this & I don't know what is going to happen. I cant talk to my friends because they just don't really understand, they care & they feel sorry for what is happening but they cant really understand how heartbreaking it is to watch & not know if he is going to be alright. I don't know what to do or how to snap myself out of what feels like the starting of depression. If anyone has any thoughts that might help please share them with me. I cant turn into a blubbering lump of nothing, my Husband need me & so do our 3 boys. ... View more