My mother is my all.  I sort of deified her for saving my sister and myself from an abusive father.  I reluctantly agreed with my sister to not cry or "to keep it positive" around my mother.  I cry at night, behind any locked doors, bathrooms when the shower is running, etc. I feel like I can't talk to anyone about it.  I confided in my best friend (a fixer) and her "solutions" just upset me and I shutdown.  I do go to therapy but I feel if I was really honest about how I am feeling it might worry people.  I'm torn between being there for my mom and falling apart.  I just needed to write that. thanx for listening.    j ... View more