With all due respect, Cats, getting a man doesn't mean you are reasonable...believe me. I know. ... View more

Hi samex I went to my GP with the same discussion in mind. He explained there is a difference in brain activity that is clearly distinguishable between a depressed and a not depressed human. The evidence he used was a scan print out of the active brain areas. One was mostly one colour (healthy), the other was less of that colour and more of another colour (depressed). The diagram, as I understand it, was simply showing the differences in brain activity. I found it quite convincing from a chemical point of view. I could see immediately that differences in chemical activity might be related to my sleeplessness, lethargy, lack of concentration and teariness. My concerns disappeared. I talked it through with him and got a script. I have recently worked my way down to a lower dose as I sense I am coming out of a depressed state (eighteen months later). Think of it as chemical. That's all it is. Don't overprocess it. You have greater social stigmas in your life than anti-depressants that may work for you and not have side effects. H ... View more

I'll have a quadruple bugger, please, no fries. ... View more

Yes, bugger. You are in a good space, though, Sailor. You know how to ride this bump. H ... View more

My medical knowledge comes from Wikipedia. I had a similar thing happen to me. I had an ultra sound of my heart and the operator said everything looked OK. The next day I got a call from a receptionist for a heart surgeon wanting to book me in for a tube down the throat test (see Wikipedia for the real words). It was a great shock to me to be caught in a net like that. I rang the surgeon and explained how upsetting it was have news that I may have a heart problem delivered in such a manner. He said my oncologist was the one in charge of all of that...hmmm. Wikipedia also helped me find out what a picc line. One day I'll go on Wikipedia and find out what Wikipedia means. H ... View more

Thanks for the link Joanna I've just had a look and I think it's a great idea. I remember how overwhelmed I felt by the information needs of others. That's apart from identifying my own information needs - such as, "what the hell just happened to my life?" I couldn't get an angle on it until I started seeing a counsellor who said straight away that I should delegate someone close to me (not my partner, who needed to be in the bunker with me) to handle all the incomings by using group email. It was such a good practical solution to something that had been a problem. And the CaringBridge site seems to be offering the same practical help. I'm all for it. ... View more

I'm glad you did post it, Willow. There isn't any such state as self-indulgent when dealing with your own cancer and trying to find out what the healthy thing to do might be. And you have all the carer's baggage as well. It's not a healthy combination and you are better of saying so, as you have done. H ... View more

I have a theory that diagnosis causes cancer. ... View more

Teach This is a good read for a lot of reasons. I like the way you have spelled out your natural curiosity about whether the monitoring regime is actually doing the job it's supposed to. I have those thoughts too. But, unlike you, I haven't had any evidence to suggest that Santa doesn't exist. So I keep believing. "You keep telling me I'm in remission, then I'll keep believing you. Deal?" I like the reasoned approach you are taking to following up your disquiet. Get on their territory and use their own arguments. Great way to go. It reminds me of Stephen Schneider's "The Patient From Hell", which you might be interested in if you are comfortable with the scientific discussion. I like your forceful but calm approach. One thing, though. You might consider taking someone else with you to the meeting. I don't know you, so it might not be an issue. It would be for me. That's why I'm mentioning it. Let us know how it goes if you feel like it. H ... View more