Thank y0u so much for replying and your sharing. It is unbearable to watch your loved one and your friend suffering and being so scared. Its hard keeping yourself like a piece of steel as they become so emotional reflecting what you feel but dont dare expresss because you want to be so strong for them. I agree it is a stench that the cancer permeates throughout our family. I want to protect my children and keep them feeling all will be well but i and they know it will not go away. It will remain in the backround all the time even if the treatment and trials keep it on hold it will always come back to start again. We can only live by the day by the day. Trying to enjoy a little at a time. I have decided to go on antidepressants to help me through the next 6mths because we have lost our house and we need to find another life. I know we will survive. Or I will survive. Thank you so much for making contact.
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