About Wendy

Wendy

Hi Mary I can so relate to where you are at the moment. My partner was diagnosed 2 months ago with advanced oral cancer and my world has fallen apart. Life has stopped and I don't know where to turn. I can't talk to him about how he feels as it's now at the point where talking causes too much pain for him. It's lonely, quiet and scary in this world I now live. I lay in bed of a night watching him toss and turn from the pain wishing I could just take it all away and make him better. We start treatment next month of radiation and chemo. We have one hell of a road ahead of us but I'm determined we will get through it. The doctor's have told us that his chances are minimal but they are willing to try so that's enough for me. I don't accept the time limits they have given us. I have given my love my own time limit that I set. 50 years and not a minute before. He is 43 and I am 39. We have loved each other for 20 years now. Hang in there Mary. You are not alone. I feel every bit of the pain, anger and dispair you are feeling. We will get through this. Surround yourself with people who love you. Talk to people who love you and will listen. Allow them to help you where ever they can. We will get through this Mary. Just one step at a time. My thoughts are with you.

Wendy

Thanks to both of you for your answers. We have since relocated from North Qld to NSW to have family support. With this change we have also gained a great dietician who has been very helpful. I'm glad to say he's putting on weight but still has a way to go. I'll also be sure to check out the site suggested above. Thanks also Raul, I've contacted the cancer council previously and they do an amazing job.

Wendy

Hi, my partner has been diagnosed with advanced oral cancer. He is 43 and I am 39. He is unable to have surgery as diagnosis was done too late and now faces 7 weeks of radiation and 3 courses of chemo. I'm wondering if anyone can give me some advise on what to expect when he is going through this. We have never had children so having to care for someone is a bit frightening and I really don't want to let him down. Due to his cancer, communication is minimal so I really want to help him in all ways possible. Does anyone have any advise on what I can expect as a carer and any advise on how I can make him happy.

Wendy

I really need some help finding ideas on what I can feed my partner. He's recently been diagnosed with oral cancer and is down to 56kg. We have sustagen and other protein drinks but nothing seems to be working. Does anyone have any ideas on what he can eat that is easy for him and that will put on weight. He was meant to have all of his teeth removed today but surgery was cancelled due to emergencies at the hospital. I know once his teeth are out that weight gain will be very hard so we are trying to get as much weight onto him as we can now. Any ideas for after his surgery would also be helpful too.

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