Hi Newmum.  Terrifying time for you.  You probably don't know for sure yet if the lesion is cancerous or not.  Either way, we have the best doctors and hospital systems in the world.  There are many new break throughs with immunotherapy, radiotherapy is much safer and the chemotherapy drugs will probably be the best available.  Whatever happens, hopefully you will be able to fight and see your daughter grow up.  Nothing is for certain just yet.  This is a good place to talk about your hopes and fears.  Wish you the best of luck with whatever lays ahead of you right now.  Be kind and gentle with yourself right now.  Once you know what the plan is you will be able to deal with it.  The uncertainty is the hard part.  I hope you come through this.  Please let us know how you are going - anytime.   Lots of lovely supportive people here. ... View more

Hello Ginger,   I hope you're still dancing whilst making your sour dough bread or green smoothies!   I agree that the isolation during the pandemic has not been too bad.  Just seems to have been a long, long time because of the earlier isolation to heal and recover from treatment.  The last week was even harder when you knew it was going to be possible to see family again.  We're all well and my children have done brilliantly with their children getting through this time.  Except one child who has not done well at all.  In the last two years he has re-partnered with a lady who has a 5 year old child.  My son has 3 children from a previous relationship.  The eldest is 15 and has always lived with his father as his mother left this child when he was 1 years old.  As a family we have all supported and helped this son through difficult times.  The mother of this child developed bi-polar disease and took off for 8 years.  She eventually came back and worked together again as a family to support her and incorporate her back into a relationship with her son.  It's been rocky as he has some anger issues about being left but we've talked to him imagining his mother had a broken hip and needed to be hospitalised for 8 years.  She was sick so we can't keep punishing her for that.  She's tried to get her life together but she's not the most capable person and has struggled but she had him every second weekend and has tried to help out when she can.     At the beginning of the pandemic my 15 year old grandson started behaving badly and sneaking out of the house late at night to meet up with his friends.  My son's new partner gets asthma and she thought the danger to her and her child, was not acceptable.  Fair enough.  Unfortunately, when you have a 5 year old your parenting skills are only up to that of a 5 year old.  15 year olds are a whole different kettle of fish.  He started skipping school and his school work suffered.  My son tells me that yes, he may have been a very bad teenager but he was never disrespectful to me or his father which is true.  My son also told me that things were so bad, he had contemplated driving off a bridge so I have to give him some leeway here.  Unfortunately, last year my grandson's mother was diagnosed with stomach cancer.  Stage 4.  (See how cancer is mean)!  She's been incredibly sick having chemo before and after surgery.  I bought her pjs, dressing gown and luxuries to help her through the time ahead of her and she was incredibly grateful.  Things do not look good for her and at the moment she still has a feeding peg for nights as her weight has dropped dramatically.  My son decided to send his son to go and live with his mother who was living with her grandmother in a retirement village as she had nowhere else to live.  My son thought that was the end of the story but it wasn't.  As a family we decided that the mother was too sick to be trying to deal with a wayward teenager so we interfered and the child was transferred to my youngest daughter.  His mother needs to go to QLD to live with her mother as she needs incredible support and help to get through this and is not well enough to be desperately trying to find a rental in the midst of the pandemic and with her own health shattered.     There's a whole chapter here missing about trying to step parent teenage kids.  My heart breaks fro this child who has now been abandoned by both his parents.  15 is a terrible age.  We decided on my daughter's place because she's on 24 acres and miles away from public transport and far enough away from the suburb my grandson goes to school in to ensure there is no sneaking out at night.  It's worked too.  I understand that my son is very angry with his son for having no consideration for his mother, me or his step mother in not bringing home the virus.  I also know that's pretty much what a 15 year old would do.  They think they're invincible and he's not going to catch it.     So for 6 weeks my daughter has had 5 children with 5 different schools to try to work around and she's done a brilliant job.  My grandson has caught up on components he had not completed or submitted and done all his school work every day.  He's been getting messages from his teachers who are very impressed with his work.  My daughter has worked with him with some of the maths that he was having trouble with and that has given him a sense that he can do it.  My daughter has ducks, chickens and alpacas that are all new and built fences in 2 different paddocks with the help of all the children.  My grandson has been splitting firewood and the family have been selling firewood to survive financially.  So miracle of miracles - he's been perfectly behaved and an asset within the family.  I'm terribly sad for my son because I don't think he understands the long term ramifications of giving up on a child.   He and his partner have bought this house together and I understand they are both terrified of being homeless again or going through a relationship break up again.  I try to see this as my son just sending his child to live with his mother but the timing was terrible and it would not have changed anything.     Sorry for the long story.  I have been busy cooking big meals and soups for my daughter.  My other son took up all the food and we had a lovely bbq together with my daughter and her family which was a way he could help out with the food.  My daughter's husband has been brilliant and taken him out to the garage to help him work on cars which is his hobby.  Has taught him some welding and how to mow the lawns with a ride on mower.  Either the child has completely changed, or he's finding life enjoyable right now.  It may all change when he goes back to school but my daughter has told him that this has to be his last stop.  The next one could be juvenile detention if he doesn't abide by rules that are there to keep everyone safe.  Perhaps it's a brutal wake up call.     We had to take him shopping last weekend for winter clothes as he had almost nothing.  My daughter had to go to apple to get her phone fixed.  Before you could enter the store you had to sanitise your hands and wear a mask.  I thought that was good because it made him realise that it wasn't just us pushing rules, this is how we have to survive for now.     Teeth wise - No, no new teeth as all appointments at the Alfred Hospital were cancelled after they had an outbreak of the virus in the cancer ward.  I have an appointment for the 1st June for the first plate mould.  Eating has been weird for a long time.  Appetite still has not returned.  I still tire easily as I think I just don't have enough nutrition to regain strength.  If I've had a cooking day for my daughter, my husband walks in and complains that MasterChef clean up is required and he's been wonderful helping with the clean up  of the after mammoth cooks when I have no strength left.     Hope you stay well.  Winter is coming and I think we will just be rugging up to go out rather than hibernate this winter.   ... 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Hi Aaki,   I'm terribly saddened by your diagnosis.  I can't imagine any worse news.  I can't even imagine going through this with a 2/12 old baby.  Lots of advice already given and absolutely agree with that.  Be kind to yourself.  We're struggling with the Covid-19 lockdown and you're having to deal with this on top of everything else.     The only thing I could add to the advice already given is ginger water. Cut up ginger and pour boiling water over it.  Let it seep and cool overnight.  Drink it throughout the day.  Helps with nausea and rebalances emotions.  Strengthens you.  You're about to go to war to fight this os you need to be as strong as you can be.  Make sure home is a comfortable and cosy place to fall afterwards.  I hope you have wonderful support and love around you to get through this.  Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.  Will keep you in my thoughts.  Take care and good luck on the road ahead. ... View more

Hi Pinesink, (strange name?)   I agree with all the comments here.  Ask questions and find out your best options.  You're dealing with the experts right now so you need their advice.  Budgie's advice about mouth care is good.  You're about to enter a big battle and the more knowledge you have - the more power you have.  It's a tough journey but we have the best specialists in their field and you need to trust them to do their job.  Wishing you lots of strength and support around you to get you through the journey ahead.  Good luck. ... View more

It's a terrible shock to the system to get such a diagnosis.  I'm glad you had your sister in law with you.  Nothing can prepare you for such a shock.  We always think it won't happen to us.  It's a frightening time just after diagnosis.  Just know that once you have absorbed the knowledge and told your family (that's a very hard part) - it will get better.  Once you have your plan in place after seeing the Oncologist you will know what to expect.   It will still be a rough ride but you will begin to feel a little calmer.  Doctors, nurses, surgeons and radiologists in this field are amazing and try their very best to help you.  Just put yourself in their hands and they will help you get through this.  Breathe your way through it, cry occasionally but just know you will get through it.  Most of us have here.  The worst time is before you know what's going to happen.  It does get a bit easier then.  Please take good care and let us know how you are doing.   Wishing you success - always. ... View more

Really sorry to hear your mum's diagnosis Brenda.  Most be terribly hard at 70 years to go through this.  I have a 30 year old friend going through the same thing.  She had chemotherapy first before they would do any surgery.  She made it through that but was very sick.  Mental health is critical and you need to find things that will lift your mother's spirits.  Photos, music, short walks, talking over old memories are good.  Whatever makes her feel loved and good are really important.  New pjs and a comfortable dressing gown help.  Nice slippers or ugg boots are excellent comforters too.  Perfume - she can spray and tell herself she is loved is good too.  Hand massages.  Just having you with her on this journey will help enormously.  It's a terrible time to be enduring this but wish you every success in getting through this with your Mum.  Please stay in touch and let us now how it is going. ... View more

Hi Christine,   That's a very rough journey!  Yes, stay positive because you need to be.  I hope you have the best medical advice you can right now.  It's a really difficult time to be going through this.  I've read a great deal of immunotherapy research and it's good that you are getting treatment.  Even if it's making you sick right now remember the goal is to kill these cancer cells.  I have not had immunotherapy or chemotherapy so can't help you with that.  I just know this is a scary journey to be on and can offer you support.  This is a good forum with many lovely people on it.     Wish you all good things and hope your treatment is effective.  Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.  Are you confined at home and do you have someone to help you through this?  These are scary and lonely times we're going through because of Covid-19.  Make yourself a plan of action of what to do when your anxiety is high.  Walking is really effective and good for you, if you're not feeling too sick.  Just work out what will get you through.  Good luck. ... View more

I'm so sorry Kelly.  It is a frightening time to be diagnosed.  What I've found and many others too, is that we tend to calm down a little once we know what's going to happen and when.  You can prepare for it.  The time just before that is the most frightening time.  Just know you are in safe hands and that the medical and nursing people around you are going to do their very best to help you.     It is also a difficult time for you because of the Covid-19 as to delays in getting treatment.  I'm really sorry that there isn't anything much I can say to help you.  Just know this is a good forum to discuss your worries and concerns.     I wish you the very best with this and hope some of your concerns area answered soon.  Try to get good sleep and not be sleepless in those dark hours.  If you are find a game you can play that will block it out of your mind,  Read a book.  Have a plan for what to do.  I hope you have lots of loving support around you. Please take care and let us know how things work out when you can. ... View more

Hi Sarah,   That's a hard road you're on with three young children amidst the covid-19 lockdown as well.  It's a scary time.  It's hard with young children to keep their germs away from you but just take the normal precautions - getting rid of tissues immediately, lots of hand washing too.  When my grandchildren were small I took olive leaf to boost my immune system.  Never caught a germ from them and I often minded children who were sick so their parents could work.   I think sitting and reading with a child wrapped in your arms is even better than hugging and kissing.  It's a lovely feeling for both of you of sharing a time together that will never come back.  Drawing with them is good too even if you're on the other side of the table. It's relaxing and gives children the opportunity to talk and converse.  Enjoy every moment you can because they grow up really fast and suddenly they're gone and all you have left are the wonderful memories you made together but also the wonderful, caring adults they've grown up into.  Very precious time.  Good luck on your journey and i hope your children know that you are super strong and doing your best for them, whatever that is for the day.       ... View more

Hi all,   I'm just wondering about masks.  There's a lot of conflicting information about wearing masks.  Globally, 50 doctors have died from the virus and I don't know how many nurses.  That's really frightening.  If professional cannot protect themselves, I worry that we will be able to.     I had to go to a chemist yesterday to pick up a script that a doctor sent out after a teleconferencing call.  I was surprised that the chemist did not have a delivery services set up as that would have been much safer.  I asked the chemist if they had any face masks.  I was told no and you don't need one.  I was bit worried about how this person could possibly know whether I need one or not.     Does the cancer council have any spare masks?   Good things about the lockdown?  Life is pretty much the same for me as still recovering.  Anxiety is high though.  We're living through some frightening times.  Dogs are absolutely loving it.  I feel terribly sorry for the poor people, the homeless and those without family support, who will struggle with this.  We have a home.  We have a freezer full of prepared meals that will last us for at least a month.  I am eternally grateful that I'm not stuck in a cruise ship somewhere or isolated in a hotel room.  We have our garden, bees and walks to keep us happily occupied.  My husband is still able to work and provide an income.  I think one of the best things to come out of this is that we will truly value our connections to the outside world and our families.  We will deeply appreciate them even more after this.  So many things we have taken for granted.  Thank goodness we have Medicare and one of the best public hospital systems in the world.  We are very grateful.   ... View more