Hello It must be very difficult for you to focus your mind, and heart, on the life ahead of you. I hope you and your hubby experienced joy in those 15 years (without the dark cloud of relapse hanging over you). I am also in a situation that has shattered hopes. I dated my partner for a brief time before he was diagnosed with AML. I had to fast-forward moving in with him so as to be able to become carer without the burden of keeping up with rent. Post BMT we lived in the city for 4 months, to enable daily visits to the hospital. We are now 8 months into the journey and he is in remission. Even though he worked so hard to beat this demon, he is not living his life. He has type 2 Diabetes and consumes sugar in vast amounts, his diet is appalling and exercise is non-existant. He is a gentle soul but living with him is soul-crushing. As you can imagine, there is so much more to the story. Every day I live with thoughts of leaving. Thank you for your post. I don't wish this on anyone but it helps to not be alone.  ... View more