Hi all. Very new here. Just reaching out for support and info. Mum was diagnosed early September with gastric cancer. Getting the final diagnosis was 1 issue after another which included gagging with the endoscope (2nd one after the first 1 showed a stomach ulcer and symtpoms didn't improve with medication). Now it's mid November and she is in hospice and on Saturday they placed her on a pain pump. Dad says she is pretty much asleep all day now where as a week ago she slept a lot but still had periods of wakefulness. Unfortunately I live on the other side of Australia and I haven't seen her since her diagnosis. She told dad that she doesn't want her situation to disrupt any of her children's careers or lives, or her only grand daughters-my daughter and so requested that we stay here until she has passed. At the beginning of her diagnosis, none of her wishes were respected by other members of her family and so I am torn between taking my daughter out of school early and flying there...bugger the career! And then there's dad. Diagnosed with prostate cancer in late September but kept it between him and mum. He has now been a bit forthcoming about it. He is travelling to Brisbane for robotic surgery because it's in his prostate "and other surrounding bits" and the local surgeon doesn't have the experience. This surgery is scheduled in January which is apparently prrtty quick. My sister who is in Brisbane doesn't know what questions to ask and mum and dad have been very tight-lipped about it all. They are both very practical, pragmatic, logical and stubborn so wills, funerals etc are all planned out. Its an over whelming place to be in but I feel so selfish wanting support. Most evenings when my daughter has gone to bed are spent crying on the couch. Not sure what I'm looking for here....no one really has any answers. I asked my dadbif it was time for us to come over yesterday and he said no...she could linger for weeks... Just neededbto vent I guess. If you got this far...thanks for reading!
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Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.