Chapter 2

[gn21]

Realised I probably need to cut the long story short and focus on the lowlights and highlights! Having gone through the X-ray, ultrasound and CT scan, and having the doctor ri going me urgently (always a worrying sign) it was fairly clear that it was suspected I had lung cancer. Time to start talki g to partner about it, having kept quiet for the precious 2 weeks. So during dinner on the Friday night I turned off the tv and uttered those scary words 'we need to talk'. A few tears were shed, the only ones ever shed in fact. Standard round of appointments the following Wednesday, where I had tests I didn't even know existed. Partner was with me, and after the completion of tests we went to my very new workplace to break the news that I wasn't a good long term employee. When all was said and done my career with the new organization lasted 6 days! But, that being said, they remained supportive (my bosses had sought me out after working with me elsewhere), and my sick leave gave me a good safety net. Not having taken more that 2 days sick certificated sick leave I. 28 years was now proving to be a lifeline. Still had the biopsy to go. And this was o e of my first annoyances. Having gone through the biopsy and all the anxiety of waiting for the results we attended the appointment (we live 2 hours out of Melbourne so a far bit of driving is always involved) to be told by doctor (who clearly hadn't read the reports earlier) that the biopsy did not get sufficient samples and a new, different, biopsy was required. Damn and drat. New biopsy schedules, this time successful, with results being non small cell lung cancer, stage 2 most likely. Excellent candidate for surgery, with chemo and radiation probably unnecessary. Whilst obviously delighted I was also feeling like a bit of a fraud. All the drama of telling people I had cancer, and I was going to be cured! In terms of telling people we worked on a graduated scale. We first said I had a something in my lung, then a lump in my lung, then a tumour. People slowly made the connection to cancer. And so surgery was scheduled, for mid March 2009. I had never had any surgery previously but was thinking, bring it on! As I have learnt, most of us feel better if we are doing something/anything. And emotionally I reckon I was coping really well. We don't do tears, are fairly pragmatic, and have a good dose of black humor, which is not always appreciated by others!