My husband had to have an MRI on his lungs and upper abdomen this morning to find out if his lung cancer has spread in that region.
Anyway!! he insisted on walking into the lift and up to the xray dept wanting and needing to be independant,he refused to use a walker or a stick,I was by his side at the ready to support him if needed.
I know he looks very thin,frail and shuffles along but I didn't expect the nasty comment that was aimed at me by another patient in the waiting room.
She had the audacity to say to the other people (approx 15)in a very loud voice "He should be in a wheelchair?" "That is shocking for her to allow him to walk in his condition,can't she see he is very sick"
At first I wanted a hole to appear and swallow me up and then I got so angry...how dare she judge me without knowing me or my husband.
It took all my skills to calm down before I responded to this woman,and I knew I had to otherwise I would have gone home feeling resentful.
When Rex had been called in to get his scan done,I went over to this person and assertively told her in a soft calm voice how very brave my husband is for wanting to walk on his own for as long as he can and that he is terminally ill (without going into details)
and that I hoped with all my heart that anyone who thought it was shocking may look at the courage it takes to support someone who is very ill and to accept what they want.
Honestly!you could have heard a pin drop...no apology but I wasn't expecting one.Lots of nodding and smiles from the other people though.
Sometimes I just want to scream at these clueless people,it is hard enough to deal with all the day to day issues let alone be judged in such a cruel manner by a complete stranger..
Just wanted to share and ask if others have been judged/ criticised during caring for your loved one and how you dealt with it.
Gentle hugs for all you brave people.
Dotty
